Show Me How To Love
by Xx-Erin-xX-AthrunxCagallifan
Summary: A new family of kids at Lawrence High School brings a new perspective to Dean's life, especially when he becomes inexplicably drawn to the youngest of the siblings, a severely autistic boy who has never spoken or touched anybody in his entire life. Rating will possibly go up later. Possibly upsetting psychological subject matter.
1. Prologue: Questioning Love

**Hello Supernatural fandom! I just got into this fandom this year - I know a little slow on the uptake but I never actually got a chance to watch Supernatural on TV (the timeslots never worked out for me, ever) so this year I bought the box set and have almost finished season 7. I was hooked instantly (especially since they play 70's rock - hello greatest era for rock and roll ever!). Anywho this is my first SPN fic so constructive criticism is welcomed! This is also posted on AO3 for anyone who prefers that site.  
**

**Okay onto the notes for the story. As said in the summary this will contain possibly upsetting subject matter as it is examining a serious case of autism. Also severe bullying for anyone who may be triggered by that.**

**A note on Cas's case: If you know somebody with autism and something I've written doesn't fit with their case, don't harass me and tell me I'm wrong; every case of autism is different and there are varying types and severity for each person. I grew up with an autistic boy who went to one of the programs where help them and now he's just like any other kid: he goes to the movies and has a girlfriend etc but sometimes it becomes too much and he retreats into his safe place. So through that and the fact that I'm a psych student, I know a bit about autism. That being said I am taking some creative license so there will be a couple of things that might be a little out of the ordinary but this is fiction so suspend your disbelief please.**

**Now, please enjoy :)**

* * *

_"Nobody can teach you love. Love you have to find yourself, within your being, by raising your consciousness to higher levels. And when love comes, there is no question of responsibility. You do things because you enjoy doing them for the person you love. You are not obliging the person, you are not even wanting anything in return, not even gratitude. On the contrary, you are grateful that person has allowed you to do something for them. It was your joy, your sheer joy. Love knows nothing of responsibility. It does many things, it is very creative; it shares all that it has, but it is not a responsibility remember. Responsibility is an ugly word compared to love. Love is natural."_

_Osho_

It's a hard lesson to learn, really.

How can you tell whether somebody is doing something for you for their own gain or because they truly care and want to help you? How do you know if someone is telling the truth when they say 'I love you' and not just using the words with ulterior motive? How do you know feelings are real and not just born of pity?

Very difficult questions if you're not a mind reader.

Dean Winchester had these very questions answered so easily by a boy who had never said a word in his entire life. Who had never even touched another person voluntarily. All of the hardest questions people ask when it comes to that both wonderful and terrible thing: love. Something Dean hadn't even really been searching for.

But that's the thing isn't it? You don't find love, it finds you. Or rather, it comes crashing through the front door without so much of a 'how do you do' before you're swept up in its whirlwind of emotions and adventures.

That's how Dean would describe his encounter with that pesky little thing.

It was long and very difficult but more satisfying than even a piece of warm apple pie right out of the oven.

That's love, alright, so just let me tell you all about it.


	2. Chapter 1: The New Kids

**Now we meet the main players of the story :)**

* * *

The new kid was... weird. Or that's what everybody else was saying when Dean pulled up in the school parking lot on the first day of his Senior year. His younger brother Sam was with him, just starting his Freshman year of high school and he was way too excited to be normal.

"You are such a nerd," Dean sighed as he shut the door of the Impala his father had gifted him for his birthday over the summer.

"Jerk," Sam responded.

"Bitch." Dean fluffed his hair teasingly and Sam batted his hands away. It was then they both heard two girls chatting about the new family as they walked past.

"I heard Dad talking about them too," Sam said, glancing sideways at Dean. "The Novaks. Dad met their mother at the shop when she got her car checked up. She was really suspicious when he casually asked her questions about her family. They like to keep to themselves apparently."

"Huh... wonder why..." Dean responded, ditching Sam at the front of the school when he spotted his friends, hearing the occasional word about the Novaks and something about their weird kid brother.

Dean shrugged it off; Lawrence was a small town so most of the people had the typical small-town, born-here-gonna-die-here mentality so anything out of the normality of their perfect little lives was considered weird. The kid was probably perfectly normal so Dean didn't cast another thought on it.

Until lunchtime when he met his friends at the cafeteria.

His group consisted of people he'd been friends with most of his life (Jo and Ash – their mother Ellen had pretty much become Dean and Sam's surrogate mother after their own mother died when they were kids so Jo was his best friend and she and Ash like siblings), guys he'd met in school (Gordon and Crowley) and girls who wanted to get in his pants (Lisa and Bela to name a couple).

He was busy catching up so he didn't notice the new family walk in until everyone went quiet and started whispering. There were three of them. Two guys and a girl all strikingly different yet with the subtle similarities that clearly marked them as family. The girl had long, deep red hair and was undeniably beautiful. She was on one side of the smallest sibling who was hunched within an oversized trench coat, dark head bowed so that Dean couldn't see his face. On his other side was a sandy-blond guy around the same height as his sister, he had his eyes narrowed scanning the cafeteria as they walked through, locating a table as surreptitiously as he could with everyone staring.

Dean thought it was unusual that neither sibling touched their younger, simply walked with him between them, guiding him with soft words. They passed by Dean's table and Gordon stuck his foot out, trying to trip the girl but she lithely jumped over his foot, shooting him a deadly look.

"Dude..." Crowley said with a snicker.

"What?" Jo demanded. "How would you feel if everyone was staring at you?"

Before anymore words could be exchanged Sam joined them at their table and Dean raised his eyebrows at his little brother.

"Really, Sammy?" he questioned.

"It's my first day," Sam protested.

"Alright but you need to find your own friends to sit with soon."

"Jo and Ash are my friends, too, Dean."

"That's right, we love this kid!" Ash announced, throwing an arm around Sam and squeezing him tightly. Dean rolled his eyes, holding back the smile threatening to break free as it always did around his family. Jo gave him a knowing look before glaring at Crowley who was muttering with Gordon in low voices.

"So, those are the Novaks, huh?" Dean questioned, catching her attention before she starting throwing a hissy fit. She made it perfectly clear to him repeatedly that she did not appreciate his choice in friends.

"Yeah, the girl Anna is in my grade, we had classes together this morning," Jo replied, eyes flicking to the boys by Dean every few seconds.

"What's she like?" Dean wondered, eyeing the long red hair at the table just down from theirs where the siblings were seated. That girl was damn gorgeous.

Jo raised an eyebrow and folded her arms across her chest. "Do not even go there, Dean Winchester."

"Who said I was going anywhere?" Dean demanded, feigning innocence. Jo just raised her other eyebrow and returned to his original question.

"She's quiet. Ran off at the end of class like nobody's business though."

"Huh..."

Dean returned to his lunch and ignored Gordon and Crowley which he realised too late was a mistake when they shifted down the cafeteria bench to a position with a clear shot to the back of the smallest boy's head and began flicking their cheese fries at him. Jo and Dean both moved to tell them off when they were cut off by a terrified shriek and all eyes turned to see the boy huddling in his trench coat, shaking like crazy, continuing his frantic cries.

"What the hell, you morons?" Jo shouted, leaping to her feet and brandishing her salad fork at them. Crowley cowered a little while Gordon just gave her a cool look. Dean's attention remained entirely on the boy who became even more distressed when his sister put a hand on him, withdrawing it immediately.

Dean spotted the principal being led into the cafeteria by a student who clearly hadn't known what else to do and Dean nudged his friends. Their whole table and stood and left, Jo giving the boys her haughtiest glare before stalking off, the other girls dispersing in different directions. Ash was dragging Sam with them who was still looking back at the family.

"You'd better hope nobody saw what you did," Ash said darkly.

"Come on, it was a joke," Crowley said before turning into another hall to visit his locker before class.

Ash decided he couldn't stand to be in a still chuckling Gordon's presence any longer and decided to leave. Sam had a thoughtful frown on as he sat beside Dean outside in the courtyard. Gordon tried to pull Dean into a conversation but he wasn't very responsive, all he could think of was that kid and wonder why he'd reacted that way.

"Dude, are you even listening to me?" Gordon demanded as the bell rang.

"No," Dean responded honestly. "What do you think was wrong with that guy?"

The other boy scoffed and jumped down off the table, followed by the Winchesters.

"Just some freaky-"

"He's not a freak," Sam cut in and Gordon shot him a dark look that had Dean bristling at his so-called friend. "He's autistic. Any idiot can see that."

Dean blinked. Oh, well that explained nothing to him. All he knew about autistic kids was that they weren't very good at being social. He didn't know any specifics. He certainly didn't know they had freak-outs over being hit with cheese fries.

"Then he should be in some nuthouse. It's not up to us to look after lunatics."

"He's not a lunatic either," Sam huffed and Dean put a hand on his shoulder.

"Go to class, Sammy," he said gently and pushed him off. Sam glared at Dean, looking hurt and stalked off. Gordon scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Your kid brother is a brat," he said and Dean looked at him darkly which made Gordon recoil slightly. "I mean-"

"Shut up," Dean snapped and walked off to his next class. He was surprised to see one of the new kids sitting beside his usual seat. He looked distressed and anxious. Dean didn't blame him after the cafeteria incident. He sat down and the kid looked at him and smiled weakly.

"Hi, I'm Gabriel Novak, I'm new here," he offered.

"Dean Winchester, and I know," Dean replied. "So you're that autistic kid's older brother?"

Dean was taken aback when he was suddenly fixed with a harsh stare. Looks like he wasn't the only protective older brother in this building.

"Don't you dare say anything bad about my brother," he said in a soft, dangerous voice.

"Relax man, I wasn't going to. I was just asking." Dean raised his hands warily and Gabriel flushed, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry. I'm just used to people acting as if he's got some kind of disease. I hate people treating him badly. I just know that's how it's going to be here." He looked sad and Dean smiled a little.

"Don't worry, I've got a little brother too, Sammy. I mean, he doesn't really _need_ me to look out for him – or so he says – but I still get the whole protective thing." Dean pulled his folder out as other kids started filing in and Gabriel looked relieved.

"How old is Sammy?" he wondered.

"Thirteen going on fourteen, but he got skipped up a year so he's a Freshman," Dean explained. "The little nerd."

Gabriel laughed. "Cassie – Castiel – is fifteen. He shouldn't really be here but..."

"Yeah, I was wondering about that. Our school isn't really equipped to deal with someone... like that." Dean winced at his own choice of words but Gabriel didn't seem to mind. Dean wondered why they were even discussing this, they'd literally just met.

"Well, we don't have the money to send Cassie to any of those special programs to help him," Gabriel explained. "Michael and Lucifer, those are two of my older brothers, tried to home school him but Cassie would get upset when Anna and I left for school. Sometimes he seems to know just how... different he is from most people and it upsets him. I think he wanted to come here with us to feel a little more normal. Michael eventually gave in because he can't deal with Cassie being that upset every single day."

"Your brothers look after Castiel?" Dean wondered. "Where are your parents? Why aren't they in college?"

"Raphael is, thank God. But Mikey and Luci decided to stick with us."

"Yeah, but why?" Dean looked at his – he supposed new friend was an appropriate term – with a frown, trying to understand.

"Well, it's Michael's job to look after Cassie and Luci loves his twin and wouldn't go without him so they both do distance ed," Gabriel shrugged.

"Why is it his job?" Dean wondered.

Gabriel looked suddenly very sad and very tired, so much older than he should. "Dad left a long time ago, he just couldn't deal with Castiel and how much attention and care he needed. Mum'd been taking care of him by herself for over ten years. She eventually got depressed – I mean she's a mother who can't even touch her youngest child – and tried to kill herself and Cassie. Michael and Lucifer stopped her and while she was getting treatment in the psych ward Michael made the decision to become Cassie's legal guardian and put off college to look after him. Lucifer stuck with him because they've always got each other's back – the whole twin thing."

Dean almost smiled at that but the situation was just too much.

"None of you have ever touched him?" he wondered.

Gabriel shook his head sadly. "It kills Michael and Lucifer. They would love to be able to hug him and make everything better like they did with Anna and me when we were little."

The teacher called them to attention so Gabriel just gave Dean a smile and turned to the front. Dean tapped his pen on his folder, thinking. He knew that he and Sam had it tough after their mum died but it was nothing compared to this. He decided to have a word to Gordon and Crowley about leaving Gabriel's little brother alone – they didn't need harassment on top of everything else. With that in mind he focussed on his work, not really thinking about Castiel again for a while.


	3. Chapter 2: Family

That night while Dean harassed Sam as he cooked their dinner there was a loud shouting match happening across town on the top floor of the Novak household – or rather there was just one Novak child shouting himself hoarse while his brothers listened. Their mother had just left for her night shift at the hospital when Gabriel had finally told Michael exactly why Anna had called Lucifer to bring their baby brother home early.

Michael sat up straight in his chair, hazel eyes hardening rapidly before standing and striding out of the dining room. Lucifer and Gabriel glanced at Anna who nodded and quietly requested for Castiel to come join her in the den while their brothers went upstairs.

It took about five seconds after Michael shut his bedroom door for it to begin.

It was most of the usual stuff. Michael pulling on his hair and blaming himself, calling himself stupid and wondering why he ever thought it was a good idea to let Castiel out of his sight. He looked half-crazed and his twin realised he was seconds away from blaming Gabriel who already looked like he was blaming himself too much so he stepped in.

"Mikey, Mike, _Michael!_" Lucifer snapped, grabbing Michael's shoulders and giving him a shake. "That's enough. Do you want him to hear you?"

Michael sobered up immediately, now just looking defeated. "Why did we do it, Lucifer? We shouldn't have let him go. Of course they were going to be cruel."

"Hey, they just need to get used to him." Lucifer tried a hopeful smile but Michael glared at him.

"It wasn't that long ago that we were in school, brother, you know as well as I do that kids are cruel and they don't like anything that's different. It won't change. He's not going back."

"No!" Gabriel and Lucifer protested.

"No, you know how he was when he was left at home," Gabriel reminded him weakly.

"Mike, this is the only thing Cassie has ever really communicated to us – he _wanted_ to go to school with Anna and Gabe. We can't stop him," Lucifer added, looking desperate.

"But-"

"No, Michael. You promised him. You promised. You're not supposed to break promises. It's-"

"Our family code. I know." Michael heaved a deep sigh, looking distressed. The silence between the brothers was broken by the soft notes of a piano floating up to the second level. It was muffled by the closed door but they could still hear it.

Gabriel smiled, relieved. "Cassie..."

"There, see now, he can't be too traumatised," Lucifer grinned, tapping Michael on the arm with his fist. Michael tilted his head, exhausted and left his room, trudging down towards the den to sit with Anna and listen to Castiel playing the piano.

Gabriel's smile faded. "Luci, I'm so-"

"Don't even say it." Lucifer wrapped an arm tight around Gabriel and practically dragged him from the room to follow Michael. "You're going to turn into Michael if you keep putting so much pressure on yourself. Cassie will get used to the other kids. It'll still upset him if they touch him or throw things but I think he'll learn how to avoid it, the same way he now avoids Mum and comes to one of us if he needs something."

Gabriel nodded. Lucifer frowned worriedly at him and gave him another squeeze before releasing him as they joined their siblings in the den, Castiel's music floating around them, the only reassurance they had that he was alright.

They didn't have a lot of faith left in people after their own mother tried to kill Castiel but they had each other. With the exception of their brother Raphael who was thankfully attending college away at Penn state, they knew the only thing they could count on was each other. Each of them often wondered without telling the others, whether without Castiel to look after would they be this close? Would they stick up for each other and take care of each other so well? It was hard to think of because in their lives, they were all they had.

Unknowing of the turmoil in his siblings, Castiel just kept on playing.

* * *

For the rest of the first week of school, Dean didn't see the Novaks in the cafeteria anymore. He looked for them each day, trying to be subtle so Gordon and Crowley wouldn't realise what he was doing, but he couldn't see them. He wondered where they were sitting.

But each day after lunch he sat with Gabriel in his English Lit class and got to know him. He really liked the guy and wished he could invite him to sit with his friends at lunch but knew better than that. It would only end badly. He also had Gabriel in his class before lunch, something he hadn't realised that first day so when he found out he requested Garth to swap seats so he could sit with his new friend.

"Hey Dean," Gabriel said, taking his arm and pulling him aside after class on Friday. "Thank you."

Dean suddenly felt hot around the collar and shifted uncomfortably. Man he hated emotional stuff. Why couldn't the guy just let it go unspoken? Dean wasn't so much of an idiot that he didn't know what he was being thanked for.

"Don't sweat it," he mumbled, rubbing his neck and looking around. Gabriel huffed out a tiny laugh.

"Right. Well, I guess I'll see you Monday." He sounded miserable so Dean looked at him curiously.

"Or you could come hang out with me now," Dean suggested, gesturing to all the kids flocking to the doors, voices rising in excitement of the weekend ahead. "It's the weekend."

Gabriel shook his head slowly. "Michael's getting me and Cassie after school. It's time for his weekly appointment. I hate those things so much."

Dean frowned. "Why?"

"You have no idea how much they upset Castiel. He cries and screams. He hates going and he hates the doctor. It's so hard, seeing your baby brother that upset and knowing there's nothing you can do to help him."

Dean grimaced and walked with Gabriel towards the front office where he was supposed to meet Michael. Anna had already collected Castiel and they could see him standing silently by the waiting chairs, head bowed as usual. There was a man in the office, signing something before turning to Castiel.

"That's Michael," Gabriel pointed out the man who didn't really look too much older than they were, trying to get the youngest Novak to take his hand. Dean's heart broke a little at the resignation on Michael's face when he gave up as Castiel just continued to gaze at his own shoes.

"Gabriel! Come on!" Michael called, looking up at him. Gabriel suddenly looked panicked. Dean made a snap decision, hating how distressed his friend was.

"It's okay," Dean said suddenly, making the brothers look at him. "I can give Gabe a ride home if it's okay with you."

Michael tilted his head and looked at Gabriel who nodded eagerly and, though Michael looked unhappy about it, he agreed.

"I will be late," he informed Gabriel. "Lucifer is supposed to cook but you know he won't. Make sure you and Anna have all your homework and chores done by the time Castiel and I are home. Castiel, come with me."

Castiel transferred his gaze to Michael's shoes so he could follow him in perfect step.

"Now I feel bad," Gabriel murmured.

"Why? You got out of going."

"Yes but now Michael has to go alone. You have no idea how much he hates that specialist. He hates anything that upsets Cassie."

Dean rubbed Gabriel's shoulder. "You guys put too much pressure on yourselves. Come on, let's find Sammy and we can go out for burgers and take your mind off it."

Gabriel nodded and managed a small smile that seemed genuine. Dean was happy to introduce Sam and Gabriel who seemed to get along immediately. Dean almost told Sam to shut up when he started to ask about Castiel but Gabriel shook his head.

"It's okay, Dean. Sam's just curious and that's totally fine. I only hate people asking if they mean to be cruel about it."

Sam poked his tongue out at Dean and began his questioning about Castiel's condition. Dean had always hated that word: condition. It's what the doctors would say about his mum before she died. 'Her condition is no better but it is stable'. 'with her condition the way it is' – speaking about her as if she was some kind of science experiment instead of a human.

They arrived at the Roadhouse and Gabriel's eyes widened.

"Why are we at a bar?" he asked, looking at Dean worriedly. "Michael will kill me if I drink, I'm not kidding."

Sam laughed.

"Relax, the owner is a friend of ours," he explained.

"The Roadhouse does the best burgers and pie in the state and we're allowed in to get food since Ellen loves us," Dean explained. "Come on."

The brothers led Gabriel inside who looked nervous as he looked around. He relaxed when he realised it was mostly empty since most workplaces hadn't knocked off for the day yet.

"Dean! Sam!"

The boys were enveloped in warm hugs by a woman with dark blonde hair who smiled happily at them before smacking the back of Dean's head.

"Hey!" he protested.

"And just where have you been? I haven't seen you two in god knows how long," she explained, folding her arms.

"Busy. Jesus, woman, that hurt," Dean said, scowling. Gabriel laughed and Ellen turned her gaze onto him.

"This is Gabriel Novak," Sam introduced. "He's a new friend of ours."

Dean rolled his eyes. Of course Sam would claim friendship even though they'd only met that day. Ellen welcomed Gabriel with a bright smile and sat the three down at a table together before bringing out some soda and taking their orders.

"Okay, this place isn't so bad," Gabriel decided and Dean grinned.

"Wait until you try the pie."

"Dean, not everyone is obsessed with pie the way you are."

"Shut up, bitch."

"Jerk."

Their banter had the desired effect and Gabriel relaxed, joining in with their jokes and Dean was sure before they were even halfway through their burgers that Sam was in absolute awe of the older guy.

Sam left the table at one point and Gabriel's resignation returned.

"Dude, seriously, what's the real problem?" Dean questioned. "You can't be this upset about missing something you hate."

"No... I'm not. It's just... you've got no idea how hard this actually is Dean. None of us understand him, we're just doing the best that we can. All we've got is each other." Gabriel heaved a sigh and his shoulders slumped. He glanced at his watch. "I should be getting home anyway."

"Sure, man. Come on."

They said goodbye to Ellen who waved off all attempts to pay for their food and told Gabriel to come back any time. Dean followed his directions to his house and parked on the curb.

"Thanks for this, Dean, Sam," Gabriel grinned. "It was nice to get out of the house for an afternoon."

"Any time you need a break, you call me okay?" Dean said and Gabriel nodded, said goodbye and got out of the car. Dean waited until Sam climbed into the front seat before driving home. It hadn't really occurred to him to wonder how hard it was on the family, having to look after their younger brother like that. Dean glanced at Sam and realised that on some level he understood a little. Family was important.


	4. Chapter 3: Castiel hates doctors

**I hate the ending. Sorry it's bad.**

**Okay, please note that the first part is going into minimal detail on Castiel's distress because Michael blocks everything out. There will be later times where I might go more in depth but I'll make sure to warn because it might be distressing if I write it well (not a likely scenario). Also, Castiel's psychologist is a nice man, he's great and he's very good at what he does. Castiel simply hates doctors and he hates strangers and he hates being touched and basically he does not like his appointments and wishes he didn't have to have them so that is why he gets so upset. The doctor is not abusive or evil.**

**Okay, enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

Michael had his head bowed onto his hands, eyes squeezed shut tightly as if the action could somehow take him somewhere else. Beside him Castiel was curled into a ball, fists pressed into his eyes, shaking his head slightly. Michael recognised the sign of 'I don't want to be here, take me home' but ignored it. It wasn't like he could unload this responsibility onto someone else.

Lucifer would be willing but his fierce protectiveness might push him to hit the doctor... again. Michael did not need to pick up his brother's bail for another assault charge after the last one forced them to move to Lawrence. He didn't want to pack up and leave again.

And it wasn't like he could ask their _mother_ – he used that term fairly loosely. She hadn't been their mother since she dried to drown Castiel in a bathtub. Michael would never, ever forgive her for it.

He shuddered, remembering the screams he and Lucifer heard when they arrived home from school. It was clearly Castiel – those were the sounds he made when someone touched him – and something was very, very wrong. He had sprinted upstairs, his twin right behind him. They had been just in time. Castiel had screamed more when Michael wrestled him from their mother's hands while Lucifer grabbed her. They had had to knock her out and call the police and an ambulance.

Castiel flinched every time someone approached him for the next two months.

Michael hated nobody more than he hated his own mother. Becoming Castiel's legal guardian was the best decision he'd ever made. And thank god their mother was barely at home and when she was she holed up in her room and left only for food.

But that meant that the responsibility of bringing Castiel to his appointments with the autism specialist in Kansas City fell to him. He always liked to forcefully drag one of the others along so he could have some support but he couldn't very well deny Gabriel the right to spend a Friday afternoon with friends. He hadn't had a friend in so long and though that kid appeared a little rough around the edges, he seemed like he genuinely liked Gabriel and for that Michael was grateful. He didn't want Gabriel turning into him; one emotionally unstable and antisocial member of their family was enough.

Unfortunately it meant trying to calm Castiel was his job alone tonight.

"Castiel," Michael finally murmured, turning his head and opening his eyes. Castiel didn't respond except to rock more frantically. "Hey, it's going to be alright. I know you hate this, believe me, I do too. But it's going to be okay."

Michael wished he didn't have to do this.

He flinched when Castiel did as the doctor called his name.

"Come on, Castiel," he murmured. It was times like this he wished he could hold Castiel's hand like he did for Anna when she had to get needles. After several moments of silent protest where Castiel rocked faster and shook his head violently Michael, very uncharacteristically, snapped his younger brother's name.

Castiel froze, probably in shock. Michael never yelled at him. He was always patient to the extreme but today was not a good day. He had to deal with this one his own. He was tired. He was frustrated. And he just wanted to go home and take an hour long, scalding shower before drinking half of the whiskey he has hidden in his bedside table.

Castiel finally got up and shuffled towards the room with Michael behind him, regretting his shortness with Castiel.

"I'm sorry," he whispered when they sat.

Castiel was working himself into a panic and the doctor hadn't even spoken yet. When he did speak the small boy whimpered and curled into the foetal position on his chair. Michael was asked the usual questions about how Castiel was doing coupled with newer ones about how he was coping at school.

When it finally came time for the doctor to turn his attentions on Castiel he was crying and shaking his head. Sometimes Michael couldn't understand it.

Dr Albert was one of the best in his field and he had never done anything untoward to his brother but for some reason he terrified Castiel and it was worse for him to be touched by the psychologist than by anybody else except their mother.

Michael grit his teeth and shut his eyes, trying to block out Castiel's cries of fear.

Soon it was over though and he was able to lead his shaking, sobbing brother back out, pay for the visit and head towards the car, promising Castiel anything he wanted for being so brave. Michael was just going through the motions however, his nerves were completely frayed. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep doing this every week.

It was with great relief that he looked up and noticed Lucifer leaning on the driver's side of his car.

"How did you get here?" Michael questioned.

"A bus," Lucifer replied, quirking an eyebrow to note that it was a stupid question. "Come on, bro, you look exhausted. Keys."

Lucifer snatched the keys the second they were in sight and ushered both his brothers into the car, crooning softly to Castiel as he pulled his seatbelt on without touching him.

They stopped at a diner for dinner because Castiel enjoyed burgers and he seemed to calm down when he was huddled between the corner of the booth and Lucifer, sipping a strawberry milkshake and eating his burger and fries.

"Thank you," Michael said softly, looking at Lucifer who tore his eyes away from Castiel.

"Not a problem. I checked on Anna and Gabe before I came and they're both being good little munchkins," Lucifer smiled cheerily. Michael nodded. "You know, you could have called, I would have come with you."

"I had to get going. Gabriel was supposed to but I wanted him to have the chance to spend time with his friend," Michael explained. "I can't remember the last time he or Anna had friends. Can you?"

Lucifer shook his head, looking sad. "It's always been just us."

They finished dinner in silence and then Lucifer drove them home. Michael allowed him to take Castiel through his night time routine, sneaking to his room without any of his siblings noticing. He had just finished showering and was heading out to lock his door so he could drink undisturbed when he spotted Lucifer perched on his bed, toying with his bottle of whiskey.

"You said you'd stopped," Lucifer commented dryly. "Cassie went to bed okay, I think he'll be alright. You should go to bed too."

Michael glowered. "Are you really going to deny me a drink?"

"Yes. It's not the way to deal with this." Lucifer scowled at him. "That's why there isn't supposed to be any in the house. Mum was drinking before she tried to... you know."

Michael shivered. "Are you comparing me to her?"

"Of course not. But this isn't healthy. I'm tipping it down the sink. Don't buy anymore."

Michael glared as his brother left before flopping on his bed, body aching as a physical representation of his mental exhaustion.

* * *

"Is he alright?" Gabriel wondered, sneaking up behind Lucifer to watch him pour the mostly full bottle of whiskey down the sink. He took comfort in the fact that there was barely two inches emptied when he found it. It meant Michael hadn't had it long. His brother didn't have a drinking problem by any means but Lucifer worried that if he used alcohol to cope with his stress then it could turn into one. So they promised long ago that neither of them would drink their problems.

"Yeah. He just needs a kick in the ass sometimes like anybody," Lucifer replied.

"I would have gone but-"

"You hate it as much as he does. Michael's not mad, Gabe, he's actually happy you've made friends for a change." Lucifer turned to smile at his younger brother who looked guilty as all hell. "What's his name?"

"Dean Winchester," Gabriel replied. "He's got a little brother Sam. They're great."

Lucifer nodded. "Don't be up too late. I'll see you in the morning." He ruffled Gabriel's hair on the way past to go to his own room and stayed awake most of the night in case Michael ended up sneaking out to find their cooking wine or something if he was desperate.

* * *

On Monday Dean decided he wanted to sit with Gabriel at lunch. He knew that meant risking the wrath of Gordon and Crowley, which also meant he'd end up on the radar of their other friends Azazel and Alistair so he was little uncertain. He just really didn't want Gabriel to think he was ashamed of being his friend or something, as girly as that sounded. He was a good guy and Dean liked him.

He didn't tell Gabriel just in case he chickened out and let the guy leave before him for the cafeteria. So he was on his own when he wandered past and open classroom and a flash of tan caught his eye.

Dean backtracked and looked back into the open classroom to see Castiel sitting alone at his desk, evidently still waiting for Anna since Gabriel had gone ahead to the cafeteria to meet them. Dean frowned deeply, it was more than unusual for Castiel's siblings to forget him or leave him waiting so he stepped inside slowly.

"Castiel," he said to alert the boy to his presence. He didn't even react. "Hi, Castiel, I'm Dean, a friend of Gabriel's. What are you doing in here?" Dean inwardly cursed, of course there would be no answer, Castiel didn't talk.

"I know Anna is supposed to meet you but... something must be holding her up. So, Castiel... hey, do you mind if I call you 'Cas'? It's sort of easier than Castiel." Dean waited, knowing it was stupid to expect a reply. "I'll take your silence as a yes. Okay, then, Cas, why don't you come with me and I'll take you to Gabe?"

Dean was surprised when Castiel pushed away from his desk and stood, eyes flicking up to Dean's face momentarily before travelling down his body to his shoes slowly, as if memorising him. Dean had seen him do it once with a teacher. He took it as a good sign and smiled warmly when Castiel's eyes went to his face once more as he put his backpack on and prepared to walk with Dean.

"I'm sure Anna didn't forget you, she probably had things to take care of," Dean said cheerfully as he walked towards the cafeteria with Castiel in step behind him, close enough to be able to follow Dean without being separated or jostled by someone walking past them but far enough away that there was no risk of Dean touching him. Dean found it incredible how Castiel oriented himself so easily around everyone for his own comfort. "I mean, it would have been better if she'd shot your brother a text so he could come get you. Lucky I was passing, huh? Here we are and there's Gabe looking pretty worried. Let's go make him feel better."

Dean wasn't sure why he was just talking like this. He knew Castiel was never going to respond but... well, he didn't think it was right to ignore him just because he wouldn't say anything in return.

"Castiel!" Gabriel said, jumping to his feet. "God I was worried! Where's Anna?" This last part was directed at Dean.

"Hey Gabe, I think Anna must be getting held up somewhere," Dean said, pulling out a chair for Castiel to sit in. The youngest Novak took the offered seat opposite his brother and Dean sat down in the one beside him, smiling at him. "I found him waiting in his classroom and thought I should probably bring him to you."

Dean watched as Castiel pulled out his lunch and started to arrange it in front of him. He didn't understand the arrangement but found the look of concentration it seemed to require kind of endearing.

"Thank you," Gabriel sighed. "I was about to go into full-blown panic mode."

Dean chuckled.

"He didn't seem worried about someone else getting him?" Gabriel wondered, frowning a little.

"Nope," Dean responded cheerfully. "Me and Cas are friends now, right man?"

Castiel, of course, didn't say anything but he did pause in the laying out of carrot sticks on their cling wrap. He actually gave a small nod and both Dean and Gabriel stared at him. They gaped at each other and Dean went to speak but was interrupted by the appearance of an almost hysterical Anna.

"Gabriel! Castiel is missing!" she was shouting but froze when she spotted Castiel straightening his apple next to his sandwich. "Oh..." She flushed deep red before dropping down next to Gabriel and leaning towards her younger brother slightly. "Castiel, I'm so sorry. My teacher held me back. I won't do that to you again."

"It's okay, Dean got him," Gabriel assured her, rubbing her shoulder. "Next time remind your teacher that you have someone to take care of or ask if you can text me – or Dean for that matter – and we can get Cassie instead."

Anna nodded, looking devastated. She turned her beautiful eyes onto Dean.

"Thank you for taking care of him," she said with a genuine smile. Dean nodded. He wanted to speak but he felt eyes on him and turned to look over at his table where his entire group was staring at him.

"It's okay," Gabriel said, looking down at the table. "You can go back to sit with them."

"Uh..." Dean observed Gordon beckoning to him, looking furious. He wasn't sure if he should go or stay and was trying to make a decision when-

"Dean!" Sam skidded to a halt by their table, startling all of them except Castiel who had just started to eat and was apparently ignoring them. "Are we sitting here now?"

Dean looked up at his little brother, about to respond along the lines of '_we_ are not doing anything' but Sam was looking at Gabriel with this worshipful expression Dean had only ever seen directed at himself before and couldn't take away Sam's enthusiasm.

"Sure, Sammy, come and sit," Dean offered, trying not to feel a little jealous that Sam was so enamoured by Gabriel when he sat next to him rather than Dean. He said he was just in awe of Gabriel's intelligence and ambition but Dean could sense a little something else. He didn't want to ask about it since Sam was so young and probably didn't really want to think about what his sexual orientation might be so he just decided to let Sam have his hero-worship crush on Gabriel but thought it prudent to warn his friend of his younger brother's feelings so he was aware.

Dean felt eyes on him and found Castiel watching him. Castiel tilted his head and then looked at Sam chattering away to Gabriel as Anna watched him with a fond smile, seemingly having picked up on his crush the same way Dean had. Castiel tilted his head to the other side before returning to eating, unperturbed by the events. Dean smiled. He had no doubt Castiel wasn't sure what was actually going on but decided to adopt his attitude and not let it bother him.

Dean eyed Castiel's chocolate chip cookies that smelt really good – homemade no doubt.

"Hey Cas, since we're friends now... think I could have one of those?" Dean indicated the cookies and Anna turned to stare worriedly but Castiel simply slid one of the cookies towards Dean without any fuss.

"Thanks, man," Dean smiled, turning to Castiel's siblings to join in their conversation, ignoring the way they looked at him with deep gratitude etched onto their faces. He knew they were so glad that someone didn't care Castiel couldn't communicate and wanted to be around him anyway, but he didn't really want them to start gushing with thanks. Chick-flick moments were _so_ not his thing. In fact they made him downright uncomfortable.

However nothing was said and they continued on as if it was totally normal – their oddly comprised grouping. Gabriel grinned every time Dean decided to include Castiel in the conversation despite his mute nature. Castiel surprised them all by spending the whole lunch hour watching Dean with what could almost be a bemused smile on his face, obviously not used to anybody talking to him so much or so normally. Sam caught on and Anna looked like she could kiss both Winchester boys, hugging Gabriel tightly as they all laughed at Dean's jokes, Castiel tilting his head, not understanding but entertained if his smile was any indicator.

Dean had seen enough to know Castiel's response wasn't normal but he didn't care. This was the first time he'd seen the kid look anything close to happy or engaged. Who cared if he probably thought Dean was nuts? He was happy that he was putting that tiny, almost unnoticeable smile on his face. He was someone who needed to feel like a protector so doing this small thing, making someone not feel miserable and alone, was just what he needed. No thanks required.


	5. Chapter 4: Dicks Will Be Dicks

**Hello all! I'm so happy with the response to this fic! Thank you everyone who is reading, everyone who favourited, followed and reviewed! You all have my eternal gratitude because I love knowing people are reading and enjoying things that I love writing so much. Because of you guys I ended up getting another chapter out today which surprised me, I didn't think I'd get another one done until next week but there you go. I hope you like it. It hasn't been edited yet because I'm feeling pretty lazy so I'll get to that later.  
**

**Warnings for derogatory, homophobic and psychophobic (same kind of deal as homophobia, people treating mentally ill people awfully and blaming it on fear - "you are not afriad, you are just an asshole") language. Sorry in advance.  
**

* * *

For the entire week Dean and Sam sat with the Novaks. On Wednesday Jo joined them, warmly accepted into the fold and instantly friends with both Anna and Gabriel. She was slightly confused by Dean's tendency to throw questions at Castiel and then act as if he'd answered but didn't comment on it, too pleased to get away from Crowley and Gordon. Dean was starting to really love his lunch hour. Spending it with his little brother, his best friend and his three new friends was just what he needed. There was no pressure at that table, on any of them. It was fun.

But Dean couldn't help but feel the heavy weight of stares coming from what he was starting to consider his old group. He knew it was going to come to a head sooner or later and he just hoped Castiel wouldn't be in the way when it happened.

Of course, he's a Winchester, so he should never have expected things to go the way he desperately wanted them to. It was on Friday and just as he and Gabe were heading out to go and fetch Castiel, Gabriel was called back by the teacher. He barely had to shoot Dean a glance before he was nodding and motioning for Gabriel to go, he could handle getting Castiel on his own.

Dean arrived at Castiel's class and waited for the last kids to exit before he stepped in and whistled cheerfully to get the younger boy's attention. Castiel looked up at the sound and scrambled to his feet, grabbing his bag when he spotted Dean. He always reacted with his own version of enthusiasm when he saw Dean was getting him from class. Dean wasn't sure how to react to Castiel's – was interest the right word? Curiosity was probably better – curiosity for him but he supposed he didn't have to. Castiel probably did just think he was insane.

"Come on Cas, lunch time," Dean said, gesturing for him to follow. Castiel went willingly, his teacher watching the pair go with a warm smile. Dean ignored her look. Everyone gave him that look, like he was performing some great service by being nice to Castiel. Screw that, he was a human being damn it, everyone should be treated that way.

Dean's stomach dropped when they barely made it ten feet down the hall before being stopped by Gordon and Crowley. Castiel glanced at them both briefly before shrinking behind Dean. Anna had told he, Jo and Sam that Castiel was an excellent judge of character most of the time. It figured he would recognised the douchebaggery in front of them for what it was.

"What do you want?" Dean growled, tensing his muscles automatically. He glanced back quickly to ensure Castiel was right behind him where neither of the idiots could reach him and set him off.

"Aw look at him Crowley, protecting the little nutjob," Gordon cooed stupidly. Dean's eyes narrowed dangerously. Crowley smirked.

"Gone and become a pussy little faggot have you? Gonna fuck the little freak because that's the only play you can get?" Crowley asked with a snicker.

Dean raised one eyebrow. "Seriously? Are we forgetting which one of us has slept with every girl in the grade? And which one of us hasn't had a girlfriend since middle school, _Fergus_?"

Crowley snarled but a steadying hand on his arm from Gordon stopped him launching at Dean just yet. People were stopping to watch the confrontation with interest. The idea of Dean Winchester being attacked by his own followers was amusing to most of them – some probably thought he had it coming. He didn't care. His only goal in this was to stall until Gabriel came and then as soon as Castiel was safely away he was going to beat the shit out of these two dickheads.

"Come on Dean, don't hide behind your words," Gordon sneered. "Wanna prove you're not fucking the little freak? Hand him over to us. Let's get him used to some touch, hey?"

Dean bristled angrily and he heard Castiel whimper. Dean really hoped he had no idea they were talking about him, but he probably did. He was socially incompetent, not stupid.

Dean was about to take a step towards the two in front of him when Castiel's teacher suddenly appeared.

"Okay boys, let's break this up before one or all of you get sent to the principal," she said firmly, eyes narrowed towards Gordon and Crowley. They both grumbled and shoved past Dean who automatically stepped back so they wouldn't touch him, meaning he left Castiel open for Crowley's foot to swing out and catch his ankle, yanking hard.

Without even stopping to consider how badly it would turn out for him, Dean's hands shot out to grip Castiel's shoulders, steadying him and moving him out of the path of the other students dispersing now that there would be no fight. Realising, far too late – a split second before Castiel reacted – what he'd just done.

"Shit," Dean gasped just as Castiel began screaming and wrenched himself from Dean's grip, flinging back into the lockers, breathing heavily and shaking his head, hands over his eyes. There were no words in his cries and that somehow made it worse. The small boy slowly sank to the ground, huddled in his oversized trench coat, crying, rocking and shaking his head frantically as Dean and the young teacher looked at each other fearfully, no idea of how to proceed.

"Cas, Cas, I'm sorry!" Dean said over his cries. He dropped to his knees in front of Castiel but the boy flinched away, curling tighter on himself. He peeked out at Dean between his fingers, blue eyes dark and filled with tears and – Dean's stomach jolted painfully and he felt sick when he saw it – betrayal.

It was then that Gabriel sprinted over, skidding down beside Dean with a terrified expression.

"What happened?" he demanded of Dean, hands fluttering uselessly in mid air as he cooed to his brother, waiting for Dean's response.

"I... I... uh Crowley tripped him and I... caught him. Gabe, I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"Dean!" Gabriel said, eyes darkening. "How could you?"

"I'm _sorry_!" Dean snapped. "It was an accident."

"Gabriel! What happened?" Anna had arrived, cell phone in hand, texting one of their older brothers.

"Dean happened," Gabriel spat, glaring at Dean who felt offended. He hadn't meant to upset Castiel. Then guilt speared him as he looked at the boy who was quieting now but still crying and rocking back and forth in his little ball, as far away from Dean as he could get with two people kneeling around him, stopping him from going anywhere.

"Cas," Dean said but his cries started up louder and he sighed.

"How dare you lay a finger on him?" Anna shrieked, glowering at him. "Castiel is fragile! He doesn't need someone we thought we could trust harming him!"

Dean flinched.

"You should just go," Gabriel hissed before turning to his brother and crooning comforting words. Dean climbed to his feet and walked away slowly with a heavy step. It wasn't like he did it on purpose. He spotted Sam staring at him in shock down the hall and he ignored him. He didn't want Sam judging him too, like everyone else around him was. They were all sending him looks of shock and disgust – it was Crowley who tripped the kid. Dean just...

Dean just broke the most important rule Gabriel had emphasised to him - _ do not touch Castiel_.

He sighed. Of course they were angry. He didn't blame them.

He made his way outside and found a secluded place to sit alone until the end of the lunch hour. He didn't have an appetite now anyway. He just wanted to think up some apology that would be acceptable to Gabriel. He really liked the guy and didn't want to lose him as a friend over a mistake, no matter how huge it might be to him.

He started pelting rocks in his frustration as he waited. He was sure Gabriel would come to find him.

Sure enough, halfway through the hour Gabriel appeared in front of Dean who leapt to his feet, apologies flying out of his mouth in incoherent sentences until Gabriel's glare made him freeze.

"Dean-"

"Gabe, please, I am so sorry. I didn't mean to. I wasn't thinking and-"

"You're right, you weren't thinking."

Dean bowed his head. He totally understood Gabriel's anger. If someone had made Sammy that upset... he would tear their lungs out.

"Seriously I just... he almost tripped. It was instinctive," Dean tried one more time. Why would they think he'd want to hurt Castiel on purpose? Hadn't he proven that he just wanted to be friends with all three of them?

"Dean... I know. I'm sorry, I guess it's just habit to be so... protective."

Dean looked up to see Gabriel rubbing the back of his neck. "I really am sorry. I didn't mean to upset him."

"I know. And Anna knows that too, she's just-" Gabriel pulled a face and Dean smiled. Just like that the tension was diffused and they sat. "We just get really touchy about it because Cassie never used to be that bad."

Dean raised his eyebrows. "How?"

"Well, we could never hug him, that's the truth – he used to panic if he felt trapped and hugging most definitely made him feel trapped – but we could touch him briefly. Like steadying him if he tripped. Touching his hand for a few seconds was like our own version of a hug. And Luci used to ruffle his hair every morning. It wasn't much but for us it was incredible because we could at least be affectionate with him in those small ways even if only for a few seconds before he got upset."

Dean nodded. "What changed?"

As soon as Gabriel's face darkened he knew the answer. "Our mother tried to kill him. She had her hands on him for such a long time and I think Michael hurt him when he pulled him away from her – we never knew because he wouldn't let anyone near him for weeks and by then he seemed physically healthy. But ever since then he can't even stand the lightest, briefest touch – they all set him off."

Dean frowned softly. "So... is the real reason you guys were angry because I touched him... or because it was my "friends" who tripped him?"

Gabriel averted his eyes. "I don't even know why you _are_ friends with them Dean. Those guys are such dicks and you're-"

"Exactly the same," Dean cut him off, wincing as he thought back on the times he'd joined in on the tormenting of the unpopular kids. Or, even worse, standing back and watching as his friends made somebody's life hell and doing nothing to stop it because he'd rather they didn't turn their attention to him.

Gabriel was staring at him in shock. "No, Dean, you're not."

"Yes. I am. Gabe, I'm just as big a jerk as the rest of them. I'm a screw up. You shouldn't even be friends with me. You could do better."

"Dean." Gabriel grabbed his shoulder and squeezed hard before standing so Dean was forced to meet his eyes or else feel very awkward about looking anywhere else when his friend was in front of him. "Listen to me. Nobody – and I mean nobody, not even his own _family_ – has ever made Cassie feel so at ease before. You make him fucking comfortable and nobody has ever done that. And you know why? It's all because of that silly thing you do where you talk to him as if he'd reply. As if he was-"

"Normal?" Dean supplied.

"Yes! Dean, you're such a good person for treating him that way. Nobody ever does. We're all guilty of babying him and giving him special treatment. But you treat him like one of the guys."

Dean shrugged his shoulders helplessly. "Only because I don't know what I'm actually supposed to do. I'm nothing special and I don't know a thing about autism."

"You want to know the truth?" Gabriel looked sad all of a sudden. "Nobody does. Not a single person. Not even all those "professionals" and "experts" who like to poke and prod at Castiel as if he's not human. They say they're going to help him but then they use words like "cure" and they run tests and make him stressed and upset – which is definitely not helping him. Cassie is _happy_ the way he is until someone reminds him he isn't like everybody else - and that's what those people do - and then he reverts further into himself making it less and less likely that he will ever emerge from his shell."

Gabriel tugged on his hair before he continued, apparently on a roll with pent up frustration he'd never had the chance to let out before. Dean let him go, making sure he didn't get too worked up but he figured it was best to get it out. He had no idea how none of that family had imploded yet with the amount of feelings they bottle up. It's not like Dean could talk but at least he had Sammy to force him to unload on the occasion. These guys were all too scared of one of them going the same way as their mother that they couldn't bring themselves to confide their fears and worries to each other.

"This country puts such a stigma on mental illness, no, the whole world does. That's humans though isn't it? Whenever they come across something different and strange – black people, ethnic people, tribal people, gay people – they either kill it or they try to change it and when they can't they label it and put it in a box so that it always knows how different it is, that it will never fit in. They forget that people who possess those differences are just that: _people_. They have thoughts and feelings and they are being crushed by the rest of the world who can't take the time to stop and really try to _understand_."

There were tears streaking down Gabriel's cheeks now but he didn't seem to notice.

Dean's heart ached for his friend. All he wanted was for his little brother to be happy and safe and healthy but the rest of the world was always trying to stop it from happening.

Before Gabriel could get so far as to condemn the entire human race to hell, Dean grabbed him and pulled him back down onto the table beside him, tucking the smaller boy into his side and hugging him. Gabriel froze and Dean grit his teeth, knowing the question was about to come.

"What are you doing?" he sniffled.

"If you tell anybody about this I will kick your ass," was Dean's only answer and Gabriel gave a shaky half laugh, half sob before resting his head on Dean's shoulder.

"Thank you."

Dean rolled his eyes. They could never just leave it, could they?

"So... how is he?" Dean asked softly.

"He's calmed down. We're waiting for Michael to come get him."

Dean worried his bottom lip between his teeth. "Are you going to tell him it was my fault?"

"It wasn't your fault. It was Crowley and that's what I told the principal and what I'll tell Michael. Castiel would have panicked anyway if he had fallen. It was unavoidable. God I hate that guy."

"You and me both, Gabe. I promise I'll figure out a way to make them leave Cas alone."

Gabriel laughed weakly.

"What?"

"In our family if you make a promise then you can't break it. It's our code. It keeps us strong."

Dean smiled. "Consider me an honorary brother then because I won't be breaking that promise any time soon."

Gabriel nodded in thanks.

Dean shifted uncomfortably. "What do you say we end the chick-flick moment here before we both grow vaginas?"

Gabriel burst out laughing and fell backwards out of Dean's grip. Dean joined in, grinning down at him in amusement, glad nothing was going to be off between them now. All he needed was Anna's forgiveness.

And... well, Castiel's... only he wasn't sure how to go about getting that. One thing was for certain though, he wouldn't be getting the image of Castiel's devastated, betrayed eyes out of his head until he did. And maybe even after that.


	6. Chapter 5: Harry Potter

**You guys are epic, seriously. Thank you to everyone who is reading this and especially those who have favourited, followed and reviewed, you guys make my day! I'm so happy people are enjoying this. I hope you like this chapter, I really love the ending :) Enjoy!  
**

**P.S. Un-edited once again but I'll get around to it later when I'm feeling more loquacious.**

* * *

Over the weekend, Dean planned. In fact he even tore pages out of his notebook to jot down ideas under the heading 'Make Cas Forgive Me'. He was sitting at the bar in the Roadhouse on Sunday night without a single dot point beneath the heading when Ellen leant on the bar opposite him and fixed him with one of her patented 'don't you dare lie to me' looks.

"What's eatin' you hon?" she wondered.

Dean frowned, wondering how much he should explain.

"I have this friend," he began. Good, this much was true. Dean had once lied to Ellen and she had cuffed him around the ear. He wasn't letting that happen again. The woman could _hit_.

"Go on."

"And I did something... bad to him. Nothing that would make you or Bobby or Dad disappointed I swear, but just bad enough that I broke his trust and now... now he wants nothing to do with me," Dean explained.

"Would this friend happen to be the autistic boy you, Sam and Jo now sit with at lunchtimes?" Ellen questioned. Dean blinked and stared at her. "Now come on, Dean, you don't think my daughter tells me things? Apparently, you're pretty good with him. What could you have done?"

"I touched him." Dean sighed and rubbed his forehead. "It was an accident. Crowley tripped him so I reached out to catch him without thinking and now... now I'm pretty sure he'll never look at me again."

"Hon, nothing's broken forever." Ellen smiled sympathetically. "He may be hurt now but... he'll soon move past it. You didn't do anything terrible, it was an accident. Okay, so what I understand about autistic people is that they don't feel the same way the rest of us do. Or if they do, then they have trouble expressing it. This boy's just hurt that you did something he didn't like, the same way you or I would be. Just say sorry, properly, he'll soon forgive you."

Dean mulled those words over. "Something tells me that Cas's idea of an apology isn't just the words 'I'm sorry'."

"You're right. It's probably an action. Find some way to gain his trust. How did you do it the first time?"

Dean gave a half-hearted smile. "I acted like an idiot. I talked to him as if he was going to answer back. For some reason he liked it."

"He likes being treated like everybody else," Ellen nodded. Dean chewed his bottom lip and noted that on his page. There, at least he had something written now.

* * *

The next week, Dean apologised to Anna who forgave him, apologising in return for the way she'd spoken to him. However Castiel wouldn't even glance at him. Dean allowed him to be angry for a little longer and then on Wednesday when Anna was sick and Gabriel had the duty of looking after Castiel all day on his own, Dean couldn't help but volunteer his help.

"Dean, that's great and all but Cassie won't acknowledge you. What makes you think he'll walk from class with you?" Gabriel asked, rubbing his eyes as he scanned the textbook on his pencil case. God he hated Trig.

"What if he has no choice?" Dean wondered.

"Dean," Gabriel groaned, a little too loud.

"Mr Novak!" their teacher snapped. They both jumped and looked up at him. He was glaring at Gabriel fiercely who sunk down in his seat. "That is the third time this week you've interrupted my class. Not to mention not handing in your weekend homework assignment."

Gabriel rolled his eyes.

"I think, you would benefit from an afternoon of detention."

"What? That is so unfair!" Gabriel burst out.

"Shall I make it two?"

The rest of the class snickered as Gabriel sank further in his seat and shook his head.

"See me at the end of class."

"But-"

"No, buts, Mr Novak."

Dean grinned triumphantly. Now Gabriel had no choice but to let him collect Castiel. And maybe he'd even have to look after him this afternoon while Gabriel was in detention and Castiel had nobody else. Gabriel nodded reluctantly to Dean when the bell rang and he made his way to the desk to collect his detention slip.

Dean practically skipped – in a _totally_ manly fashion – down to Castiel's classroom, bouncing eagerly as the kids exited the room. Finally the last one left and he slipped inside, smiling at Castiel. Castiel wasn't looking, preparing to leave as soon as he had heard footsteps coming into the room instead of out.

"Hey Cas, lunchtime!" Dean chimed. The boy jumped and his head snapped up to stare at Dean. When he took in who had come to collect him he dropped back in his seat and looked resolutely out the windows. Dean stared at him dumbfounded and Castiel's teacher looked between them worriedly.

"Perhaps you should just wait for Gabriel," she suggested.

Dean grumbled and leant in the doorway. Gabriel soon walked down the corridor, his face falling slightly when he saw Dean waiting. He shrugged as if to say 'I told you' and gestured to Castiel who still refused to move.

"Cassie, come on, I'm hungry," Gabriel said wearily.

"It's me," Dean muttered darkly. "Fine, I'll just go."

With that he stormed off and Gabriel watched him leave sadly.

"I think you hurt his feelings," he said to Castiel who had decided to stand now and follow his brother to the cafeteria. Either the younger boy didn't hear or simply didn't care as he made no acknowledgement of Gabriel's words.

They joined Sam, Jo and her brother Ash at the table. Ash was Monday's new acquisition and Gabriel found he like the laidback boy who was a completely contrast to his fiery, abrasive sister.

"Where's Dean?" Jo asked.

"Is he sulking since Cas won't talk to him? Or... well..." Sam blushed, fumbling for the right word and Gabriel laughed, reaching over the table to ruffle the kid's hair fondly.

"Don't worry, kiddo. And yeah, he's sulking," Gabriel shrugged. "You know it's a shame Cassie. This means you'll have to wait alone in the library this afternoon."

Castiel finally paid attention at this, cocking his head curiously.

"Yeah. I have detention. I texted Luci and he said he's not making two trips so you've got to hang out here while I serve my unjust punishment. If you were still friends with Dean he could wait with you but since you're being stubborn – a trait I didn't even know you possessed – you'll just have to be alone. I mean... are you okay with that? If it really worries you, Luci can come get you."

Castiel shook his head minutely.

"Right then. After your last class – gym right?" Gabriel waited and glanced at Sam who nodded. He and Castiel practically had opposite timetables, something that had annoyed the younger Winchester who would have liked to have some classes with Castiel so he could look after him. "You wait until everyone's gone from the parking lot and then you walk back over and wait in the library for me or Luci. Understand?"

Castiel gave a tiny nod before returning full attention to his lunch.

"Is that a good idea?" Jo wondered softly, eyes trained over Gabriel's shoulder. The older boy glanced around to see Crowley, Gordon and their two friends Azazel and Alistair all looking much too innocent, staring anywhere but at their table.

"Sure. Cassie knows how to wait until nobody's around. He prefers less people anyway." Gabriel smiled at his younger brother. "Besides, I'm sure Luci was only joking. He won't be too long after school – not with Anna home sick anyway."

"Hey, tell her to get better," Jo said. "My morning classes were so boring."

Gabriel grinned. "I'll be sure to let her know."

He was so glad they'd moved to Lawrence. He and Anna had never had a single friend before and here they were with a whole group of them. And not only that but these people accepted Castiel too. None more so than Dean though so Gabriel really hoped his baby brother could find it in himself to forgive Dean but he was doubtful. He didn't know how Castiel's mind worked on matters like this – he forgave his siblings for accidental touches, but Dean had been a stranger not too long ago, the first and only Castiel had trusted and Dean had broken that trust. Gabriel wondered if something like that was unforgivable in Castiel's mind?

* * *

After ditching his last class due to his bad mood, Dean traipsed from the bleachers around to the car park. Almost everyone was already gone – including Sam who had gotten a lift with Jo and Ash due to Dean's absence – so the parking lot was quiet. He started making his way over to Baby when he heard three very familiar laughs that made his blood run cold.

Dean turned around slowly and spotted the three people he did not want to see, lurking at the edge of the car park, staring at the gym doors. Dean frowned, wondering what they were up to.

"Sh, guys, shut the fuck up, here he comes," Gordon hissed.

Dean's heart almost stopped when he spotted the flash of impossible-to-miss oversized, tan trench coat wrapped around a small, very vulnerable boy.

Just what did those assholes think they were doing?

Dean frowned further when he realised that Azazel wasn't there. Alistair hardly went anywhere without his little sidekick but he wasn't anywhere in sight.

"Come on," Crowley sneered.

Dean darted around in front of the group as they started moving towards Castiel.

"Do not even think about it," Dean snarled, eyes narrowed at Gordon.

"Shut up Winchester," Alistair sneered taking advantage of Dean's eyes being on Gordon and swinging an uppercut into his gut. Dean's breath huffed out of him and he doubled over, to catch it. He grabbed Gordon's arm as he passed but the boy threw him off, sending Dean sprawling. He quickly leapt to his feet, yelling Castiel's name.

"Run!" he shouted. The boy stopped walking however which was probably the worst thing and then he was surrounded by the three much, much bigger guys. "Get the fuck away from him!"

Dean took another step when a pair of arms grabbed him – so that's where Azazel was, keeping watch. He swung his elbow back and caught Azazel's eye. His attacker grunted and arms loosened enough for Dean to break free but not before Crowley had put his hands on the boy, causing him to cry out and try to escape but Alistair just shoved him into Gordon who knocked him back.

Dean's heart ached as Castiel cried out, wordlessly begging for them to leave him alone, putting his arms over his face to protect himself.

Crowley spotted Dean's murderous expression as he came over and they gave one last shove, causing Castiel to flop into one of the puddles left by the day's rainfall where he curled up, sobbing and keening, not even bothering to move out of the water.

The guys scattered except Gordon who dodged the punch Dean threw at his face and laughed at him.

"It was just a bit of fun, Winchester," he chuckled. "The kid needs to learn a thing or two."

Dean grabbed Gordon's jumper and yanked him close, glaring in his face.

"If you _ever_ touch him again, I'll fucking kill you," Dean snarled, throwing the boy so he fell on his ass in another puddle. Dean kicked gravel in his face as he walked past towards Castiel, hands starting to shake because he had no idea what to do now.

"You're going to regret this!" Gordon shouted.

Dean turned and saw the four boys all staring at him, varying expressions on their faces. Dean would almost be scared of the glare on Gordon's if he hadn't just knocked the guy to the ground.

"Bring it," Dean called back.

He looked between Gordon and the shivering huddle that was the youngest Novak sibling, threw a dark glare towards Gordon and his posse then swung around to Castiel, crouching down a few feet in front of him, ashamed at how frightened and upset he appeared all soaked and wrapped in his overlarge trench coat. But he had stopped his keening, glancing slightly at Dean as he moved his arms.

"Hey, Cas?" Dean said softly. "I'm so sorry about what those guys did and also that I couldn't stop them – I swear I'll kick their asses. Why don't you get up and we'll go somewhere so you can get dry?"

Castiel didn't respond for a while until finally he clambered to his feet, arms wrapped tightly around himself, staring at Dean's feet and waiting for him to lead the way. Dean took him into the school, to a bathroom first where he encouraged Castiel to dry his hair and take off his sopping coat. They went into the library afterward and sat in front of one of the heaters so Castiel could dry.

"I don't think this is going to get better and it's kind of cold out there," Dean mused, prodding the coat where it was lying in front of the heater. Then he smiled. "Here." He held out his leather jacket.

Castiel looked up in surprise, eyeing the garment with suspicion.

"Hey, relax, it won't bite," Dean teased. "It's big and warm... I mean it smells like me which might put you off a little but it's better than being cold."

Castiel glanced at him briefly before accepting the jacket and holding it up to look at it properly. When he hugged it to his chest Dean took it as acceptance and gratitude for the gesture. He shifted forward slightly and Castiel hunched in further on himself in response.

"I just want you to know... I promise I won't let anybody hurt you anymore," Dean murmured. "I know I'm not one of your brothers but I have a little brother of my own and he doesn't really need me to look out for him anymore. I kind of need someone to look after so I'm gonna look after you. How does that sound?"

He didn't really expect Castiel to respond but the slight relaxation of his shoulders made Dean hopeful that he'd understood and maybe even welcomed Dean's protection.

Dean looked up at the bookshelves where they were and spotted the several copies of each Harry Potter book that their library carried.

"Man I haven't read these in ages," Dean laughed, pulling down the first one. He glanced at Castiel who was still clutching his jacket, practically ignoring Dean. "Don't tell anyone I've read them, okay? It'll totally ruin my image. Hey... have you read them?"

Castiel hesitated before turning to look. Dean held up the cover and Castiel tilted his head before shaking it slightly. Dean stared at him.

"Something's wrong here if even _I've_ read them," Dean chuckled. He looked down and opened to the first page, feeling nostalgic. "Would it bother you if I read it to you? I'm not the best reader but I read them to Sam when he was younger and he didn't seem to think I was terrible."

Dean looked up and found Castiel watching him expectantly, like had that first lunch when Dean was telling him jokes that he didn't laugh at. Dean's heart leapt. Maybe this was Castiel forgiving him. He settled down a little closer to the boy who didn't flinch away, and started to read.

"_Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four Privet Drive, were proud to say they were perfectly normal, thank you very much..._"

By the time a man strode into the library calling out for Castiel, they'd just gotten to the third chapter and Castiel was sitting facing Dean's profile, eyes wide and captivated as he listened to the story pouring forth from Dean's lips. He looked around at the sound of his nickname and stood when he spotted the speaker.

Dean looked up and noted the tall, blonde male who must be Lucifer. That was odd... he looked nothing like Michael. They must be the other kind of twins that aren't identical... fratical? Fractional? Fraternity? Fraternal! That was it.

"Cassie, there you are!" Lucifer said, grinning, pleased. He frowned when Castiel put on Dean's jacket and folded his still wet coat in his arms. "What happened to your clothes?"

Castiel ducked his head, cheeks flaming and Dean jumped to his feet.

"I'll tell you when he's in the car," he whispered. Lucifer eyed Dean suspiciously.

"And you are?"

"Dean Winchester. I'm a friend of Gabe, Anna and Cas's," Dean explained, picking up his bag and putting the book back on the shelf. Castiel noticed with a sad expression. Dean glanced at him sideways. "It's cool Cas. I'll steal Sam's copy and we can keep reading."

Castiel nodded once, relaxing and Dean noticed Lucifer's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. But he took it in his stride and gestured for both boys to follow him. Gabriel was already in the car, looking moody and irritated. But his eyes lit up when he saw Dean walking with Castiel.

Lucifer opened the back door and Castiel climbed in obediently. Dean caught the door before Lucifer shut it and he leant a little closer until Castiel looked up at him with wide blue, blue eyes.

"So... are we friends again?" Dean asked softly, glad that the older Novak was examining his nails, trying not to listen in. Gabriel had headphones in and made a show of turning up the volume on his iPod despite that he was watching the goings on through the rear-view mirror.

Castiel seemed to consider him for a moment before nodding once, plucking at the collar of Dean's jacket. Dean smiled and nodded back before straightening up and shutting the car door. Castiel looked out at him, eyes unwavering as Dean turned back to Lucifer.

"He uh... he had some trouble today... nothing major – just some assholes who decided to touch him – but he was kind of upset about it," Dean explained. Lucifer's eyebrows shot up again. "I took care of it but he might still be..."

"Yeah, yeah," Lucifer agreed, eyes on Castiel who was still watching Dean with that indecipherable stare. "I'll keep an eye on him. Thank you, Dean."

Dean nodded and waved goodbye to Castiel as Lucifer got into the car and started pulling out of the parking lot. Castiel raised his hand and pressed his fingers to the window for a few moments before dropping them. Dean guessed it was his return of the wave.

He waited until the car was out of sight before jumping up and doing a victory fist-pump. He vowed to buy Ellen chocolates or flowers or something. Her advice was perfect.

And now he needed to steal Sammy Harry Potter series without him asking too many questions.


	7. Chapter 6: Safety Zone

**Hey guys, thank you so much for your reviews, you're all so awesome and I wanted to give some replies to guest reviewers to here:**

**Guest reviewer Jessica: Thank you, you're so sweet and I appreciate the review ^.^ Of course I'll continue, I love writing this story so much :) As for a chapter from Cas's point of view... I've been thinking about it and I would really, really like to (I was originally going to do the start of this chapter from his POV but thought it was to soon) however I'm worried about not getting his thoughts right or ruining the image people have developed of him from Dean's perspective. But we'll see, I might end up with a chapter that really _has_ to be from his :) I love Harry Potter too, that's one reason why I picked it, also because it would be something Dean would read and finally because the story is about courage and friendship and overcoming that which is placed before you (something that would mean a lot to Cas to hear from Dean).**

**Unnamed guest reviewer: *hugs* Gabriel's message is something I feel so strongly about and I'm so glad it has touched as many people as it has. Just know there are so many people who do think that same way in the world and they are so much more important than the assholes. I hope things get better for your li'l sis, it's unfair how much they cop from people who choose not to take the time to understand. All the best :)**

**Please note, in a part of this chapter Lucifer is teasing Gabriel over his sexuality. Everything he is saying is just that, teasing. It's not what he thinks and it's not what I think, it's just him being an older brother, ribbing his little brother for a rise. I know most of you would realise this but sometimes I get people who rant at me for things my characters have said weren't meant seriously.**

**Okay, here we go :)**

* * *

Michael perched on the edge of his youngest sibling's bed as he went around his room, finishing up his morning tidy before school. He only watched Castiel for a moment until he spotted an unfamiliar garment on the bed. It was clearly a dark leather jacket but it was much too big to belong to the small boy in front of him.

Curious, and thus unthinking, Michael picked up the carefully folded jacket and it was only a second later he realised his mistake as he heard Castiel's cry of dismay and the jacket was snatched from his grip as his brother began to panic, crying out and shaking as he curled up, clutching the leather close and shaking his head.

"Castiel, Castiel, stop it!" Michael said, dropping down in front of him immediately. "It's okay. I'm sorry. I promise I won't touch it again. Nobody's going to touch it. Nobody's going to take it away from you, I promise. Just... just calm down. Please... please, calm down." He continued babbling, pleading until Castiel's shrieks of fright calmed down into soft whimpers and he stopped rocking, simply shaking and hugging the jacket to his chest, face buried in the leather.

"There, good boy," Michael soothed. "Now come on, stop crying. Let's fold the jacket back up and I'll tell the others that nobody is allowed to touch it, okay?"

Slowly Castiel stood and, with such care it made Michael's heart ache, folded the jacket and placed it on his pillow. Michael wondered where he had gotten it and why it was so important to him. He then went into the bathroom to wash his face as his brother requested while Michael stumbled out and almost into Anna and Gabriel.

"What happened?" they demanded in unison.

"I happened. Anna, can you go and write up a note on Castiel's board that nobody is to touch the leather jacket in his room. We do not need another episode like that," Michael sighed wearily, shutting his eyes and rubbing his temples. Anna scurried off while Gabriel continued looking at Michael in concern. They sat on the top of the stairs together and Michael groaned. "I hate upsetting him. How was I supposed to know he was going to freak out if I touched it?"

"Whose jacket is it?"

Michael shrugged. "I've never seen it before... or at least, I think. I didn't really get a chance to examine it. I think he was sleeping with it."

Gabriel quirked one eyebrow. "Very attached then. I wonder where he got it."

"Find out for me, will you?" Michael requested. Gabriel nodded and then rubbed his brother's shoulder.

"Mike, you need to stop beating yourself up every time Cassie has an episode. You can't control him and if you continue like this you'll snap like Mum did."

Michael nodded. "I know. I guess... Don't worry, I'll lighten up a little. Keep an eye on him today, would you? He'll be jumpy after that."

"Always, Mikey, you know I will."

Michael smiled and hugged Gabriel tightly as Castiel came out of his room, stopping at the sight of affection. He almost appeared sheepish, as if he knew he was the cause of Michael's distress. Michael looked up at his concerned gaze with a soft smile.

"It's okay, baby bro," Gabriel assured him. "Michael's just tired. Now, let's go."

"Gabriel," Michael said suddenly as he started down the stairs ahead of his brother. Gabriel looked backed warily at his tone. "Don't think this doesn't mean we're not talking about you getting detention."

Gabriel grimaced but nodded and continued down the stairs after Castiel who was waiting at the bottom patiently.

"Are you excited for school or something?" Gabriel teased. Castiel looked away from him and Gabriel chuckled but said nothing else. Yesterday morning Dean had been waiting in the car park, leaning against his Impala and waved Gabriel and Castiel over to him. He had reached into his bag and held out a copy of _Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone_ which had actually made Castiel smile. It wasn't a huge beaming grin but it was definitely bigger than the tiny twitches of his lips he'd been giving them previously.

Today was the same. In fact Castiel didn't even wait for his brother and sister before he started making his way over to where Dean was standing by his car.

"Where is he going?" Michael wondered, narrowing his eyes suspiciously. "Gabriel go with him."

"I was about to. Stop being bossy." He followed his brother, Anna laughing lightly behind him as she went too.

"Anna!" Dean greeted with a charming grin. "Feeling better?"

"Don't you start trying to chat me up again, Dean Winchester, my big brothers are both in that car over there," Anna teased, nodding behind them. Michael had just started to drive away from the school but they were still within sight. Dean rolled his eyes.

"I could take them," he joked.

"Of course you could," Anna rolled her eyes.

"Luci's been arrest for assault before," Gabriel informed Dean whose eyes widened. "He punched one of Cassie's therapists in the face."

"Wow..."

Castiel was staring intently at Dean's bag and he looked at him with an amused smile. "Easy there, I brought it. Don't panic."

Castiel glanced up at him, a small smile playing at his lips.

"We'll go to the courtyard where it's quiet at lunch... I mean, if that's okay with those two..." Dean glanced at Anna and Gabriel who both nodded.

"Mind if we join?" Anna asked teasingly. This she had to see.

Dean flushed and tried to respond when Castiel shook his head adamantly. Anna looked at him surprise.

"You don't want us to come too?" She sounded hurt as Castiel shook his head again. "Well... okay..." Anna looked at Gabriel with wide, shocked eyes before the warning bell sounded and they all started to make their way inside.

They dropped Castiel off at his class and then Dean wandered in the direction of his own.

"That was weird," Anna murmured, looking at Gabriel.

"Maybe it's like their thing," Gabriel shrugged. "You know. Maybe Cassie feels like he finally has something he doesn't need us to supervise. Come on, we can trust Dean."

"No but... since when doesn't he need us around?" Anna blinked sadly and looked at the ground. Gabriel laughed and hugged her quickly.

"Of course he needs us around but... maybe we should give him some breathing room. Let's let him have this. Okay?"

Anna sighed and nodded. Gabriel squeezed her shoulders once more before sending her on her way to class, then heading to his own.

Gabriel didn't think about the leather jacket Michael had asked him to look into until just before lunch when he took his seat beside Dean, noticing something was different. Gabriel tilted his head, trying to figure it out.

"Whoa," Dean said, grinning at him.

"What?"

"You and Cas have the same deep thinking expression," Dean explained. "I'm guessing he picked the head-tilt thing up from you?"

Gabriel shook his head, smiling slightly. "Really?"

"He does it exactly the same. I wonder if that's a thing..."

"I think it might be. He has looked to us all his life to figure out how to behave and react."

Dean smiled. "Anyway, why were you looking at me like that? You aren't pissed about this morning. You can tag along if you want, I don't think Cas would throw a fit."

Gabriel bit his lip as Dean winced – they both knew that was actually a very real possibility.

"I'm not mad or hurt. I'm glad he feels safe enough to be around you without us. It's a big step for him," Gabriel smiled, hoping Dean understood how much he appreciated his very presence. Nobody had ever done for Castiel what Dean did for him. "I was just thinking that there's something different about you today. Something's missing."

Dean raised his eyebrows and shrugged, turning to his work as the class was called to order.

* * *

It was when Dean was waving goodbye from his car while Gabriel took the passenger seat of Michael and Lucifer's car that he realised.

Dean's leather jacket was missing.

In fact he wasn't wearing it the other afternoon when he walked Castiel to the car with Lucifer. Gabriel would bet anything it was Dean's jacket that had a new home in Castiel's room.

"How was school?" Lucifer asked cheerfully as his siblings buckled up. He also waved to Dean and his younger brother before following another car out of the parking lot.

"Good," Anna replied. "Jo actually missed me. It's nice to know she's not just hanging out with us because Dean is."

Gabriel shot her a smile in the rear-view mirror, pleased he wasn't the only one with a good friend.

"Though... her brother keeps making passes at me. I'm not sure how I feel about that," Anna ponders and Gabriel bursts out laughing. Ash is one of the most harmless guys he knows. He's positive that if Anna expressed true discomfort with anything he said to her, he'd stop immediately.

"Just tell him to back off," Gabriel suggested.

"Or I could," Lucifer added with an evil grin.

"Uh... no thank you," Anna teased. "I'd rather not scare off one of our few friends."

Lucifer chuckled. "If he keeps making passes, you won't be stopping me. Not one single boy at that school is good enough for you. Or you for that matter." He looked at Gabriel with a wink who rolled his eyes.

"Passes about my sexuality are not allowed, remember?"

"You mean your lack of sexuality."

"Pansexual is not sexually lacking – it's personality-driven attraction thank you, very much."

Lucifer winked at him. "I still say you're just greedy... or easy."

"Luci!" Anna said, shocked.

"Hey, I'm joking. I know my ickle Gabe isn't easy – extremely picky maybe."

"Well neither Anna, nor I, have ever really had the chance at a proper relationship since people are either douche bags or you scare them away," Gabriel commented, glittering eyes showing that he was still joking.

"Like I said, nobody's good enough for my baby brother and sister. You either Cassie, understand?" Lucifer called. "You're too precious for any of those small-town hicks, got it?"

Castiel blinked at the back of Lucifer's head, confused. He looked at Anna for an explanation but she just smothered her giggles and waved her hand in a motion that over the years had come to mean their older brother was being an idiot and that Castiel shouldn't worry. They weren't sure if he really got it but he usually relaxed when laughter and smiles showed nothing serious was happening.

When they got home Gabriel was feeling happy because it was one of the rare nights where none of them had any commitments and so they had hot chocolate and homemade cookies together before separating for Anna and Gabriel to do their homework until it was time for the four eldest to cook dinner together.

Sometimes Castiel would sit in the kitchen and watch his siblings interact but today he chose to retreat into the den and play the piano, the soft music floating into the kitchen for the others to enjoy as they started making lasagne – vegetarian since Anna was going through a phase and her brothers were more than willing to oblige, though Lucifer stoutly declared there would still be bacon at breakfast and Anna would just have to fend for herself.

"Ew, what is that Michael?" Gabriel frowned, wrinkling his nose at some of the vegetables being prepared.

"That is spinach and those are lentils, whichever you were referring to," Michael replied absently.

"Do we have to eat them?"

Michael pulled some carrots towards him as Lucifer grabbed the eggplant. Anna was busy preparing the cheese sauce while Gabriel worked on the tomato and onion sauce for the vegatables.

"Yes. They're high in iron. Since Anna is choosing to forgo meat then she has to eat them. Vegetarianism is actually a bad idea for teenage girls considering how their bodies are still developing and menstruating regularly."

"Michael!" Gabriel shouted, covering his ears. "LA LA LA! I don't want to hear about that!"

Anna giggled. "Actually, Michael, if you balance it right and take iron supplements it's fine."

"Humans are meant to eat meat, Anna darling," Lucifer teased. "Besides, you'll get over this when you miss start to miss bacon sandwiches when the weather starts to really cool down."

"I think it's why you got sick," Gabriel added. "Not enough protein."

Anna poked her tongue out at Gabriel who went to retaliate before Michael spoke, diverting the argument and starting a new topic.

"So, Gabriel, did you solve the mystery behind Castiel's jacket?" he wondered, continuing to chop vegetables even as he looked over at Gabriel. Gabriel went to answer, Michael waiting eagerly when Lucifer interrupted.

"You mean the leather one? He was wearing it when I got him from school the other day, wasn't he Gabe?" he shrugged, stirring the pasta sauce that Gabriel has basically abandoned without looking at the others.

"Do you know who gave it to him?" Michael demanded. His siblings were unsure why he was so obsessed with the jacket but they had long given up trying to understand how his mind worked when it came to his baby brother.

"Mmm... no," Lucifer murmured then looked up. "Actually, it might have been the Winchester kid. He was with Cassie when I went to get him – they were reading Harry Potter in the library, it was cute. He told me Cassie had some trouble but was okay."

"Trouble?" Anna asked as Michael's jaw dropped.

"What kind of trouble? Why didn't you mention this?" he demanded of his twin, eyes flashing as he probably swore vengeance internally on anyone who hurt Castiel.

"Because you react like this. I looked him over and asked him if he was hurt but he was fine. Seemed really... calm. If what you said about the jacket this morning is true then I understand. Dean must have taken care of him and given him the jacket. Castiel is associating it with safety." Lucifer smiled.

"Dean's your friend right?" Michael asked Gabriel who nodded. "What's he like?"

"Well, his friends are mostly a bunch of pricks and he likes to act tough but he's a big softy. All you gotta do is get his little bro to flash those big doe eyes of his and Dean's likely to do anything," Gabriel smiled. "He's a decent guy about eighty percent of the time."

Michael frowned contemplatively. "Right. Regardless, don't let him near Castiel unsupervised until I've met him properly."

"But... Michael, you should see the way Cassie gets with him. He actually gets excited to see Dean. I've never seen him react to somebody like that."

Michael looked sceptical but Anna added her own assessment.

"I think Lucifer's right, Dean makes Castiel feel safe," she said gently. "Dean talks to him like he's any other person. I think that makes him feel happy and normal."

Michael hesitated but then sighed. "Fine. But I want to meet him anyway."

* * *

Across town at the Winchester's their dinner was going pretty differently. Sam and Dean were happy to find their dad was home for dinner for a change and had brought them Thai food and rented some movies so they could catch up.

Dean was distracted, surreptitiously flicking through a pamphlet on autism that wasn't telling him anything but it was all he had. Both the school and public libraries had been very poorly stocked on the subject so a pamphlet from the health clinic was as good as it got. He'd have to go somewhere bigger for books on autism he supposed.

"So, what's been happening at school boys?" John Winchester asked. "No fighting I hope Dean?"

"Maybe a little," Dean answered absently. "But the fuckers deserved it."

John raised his eyebrows. "And just who are we talking about?"

"Gordon and Azazel, would have been Crowley and Alistair too had I gotten my hands on them," Den muttered darkly, folding the pamphlet and hiding it before his brother or dad could see what it was about. That was be so embarrassing to explain.

"And why exactly did your _friends_ deserve it?"

"They're not my friends," Dean scowled, turning his attention to the television and praying Sam would start telling their dad all about his perfect marks and perfect classes and maybe start praising Gabriel for simply walking this very earth.

John appeared confused and as though he wasn't about to drop the subject.

"Dean has a... special friend," Sam explained and Dean glared at him.

"Really, Sam?" he asked. "Special?"

"Well... it's different from all of your other friendships," Sam shrugged.

"A special friend? You mean like a girlfriend? I thought you didn't do 'the girlfriend thing'?" John wondered.

Dean shook his head. "His name is Castiel and he has autism."

"Oh, the Novak boy. Ellen told me about him," John nodded. "She said you guys were friends. What happened?"

Dean hesitated before telling his dad about the hallway incident and then the other afternoon. John went from confused, to shocked, then to a kind of furious pride at the end of the story.

"Good," John huffed. Dean's eyes widened.

"What?"

"Like you said, they deserved it. Why didn't you tell his brother exactly what happened?"

"Lucifer's a little scary – kind of lives up to his name, right? – I was a little worried about what he might actually do to them," Dean explained. "And besides, Cas seem okay and it's not like I'm ever going to leave him alone for long enough for them to get to him."

John nodded.

"Why... uh, why aren't you-"

"Acting like you're some kind of hero instead of a good friend?" John chuckled. "I served with a man in the marines. He had an autistic daughter. She was five and he missed her first words while we were serving. Even though he'd missed them he got a video and he cried for so long. I didn't quite understand until he explained. I'd never really considered my views on mental illness but I realised then that it didn't matter – they are just like the rest of us, they still have people who love them and they still feel. You've done the right thing Dean."

Sam beamed at Dean proudly and Dean just leant back on the couch.

"Dean... by the way... have you seen my Harry Potter books?" Sam wondered.

Dean feigned falling asleep.


	8. Chapter 7: Music is Magic

**Time skip alert! We are jumping forward a month so the next few chapters we are in the time of late October/Early November. Please forgive typos as I'm not editing at this point in time. I'm too annoyed by the Glee finale so I'm posting this to cheer myself up. I'll edit it whenever I get around to feeling up to it.  
**

**Thanks for all the reviews, you guys are awesome! The first scene of this chapter is my favourite part in the entire story so I really, really hope you guys like it. It's just precious.**

**Also: sneak peek of the next chapter to anybody who correctly guesses (guess isn't really the right word since I know ya'll just going to go and check your copies for the sentence but that's cool, it'd be cooler if you knew right off though) which chapter of Harry Potter Dean is reading in this :)**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Dean discovered a month later – when he was held back for detention – that Castiel could play the piano. And damn he could play well. He was heading down the hall to the exit so he could leave when he heard piano notes drifting through the halls and a voice proclaiming "Perfect, Castiel!"

Dean halted in his steps and listened as the teacher informed him that would be the end of his lesson but the music didn't stop, the song simply changed into a different one. Dean headed towards the music room where after school lessons were held and he leant in the doorway to observe as the teacher packed up, checking her watching and looking at Castiel.

She looked around and saw Dean who smiled and beckoned to her, not wanting to disrupt Castiel by alerting him to his presence.

"I'll wait with him for his family to get him," Dean assured her. "You can go if you have somewhere to be."

"Thank you," she smiled and headed off. Dean frowned a little – she hadn't even asked who he was – before shrugging it off and concentrating on the music. The song Castiel was playing was mournful and low but at the same time beautiful. Dean knew it must have some meaning to Castiel since there wasn't even any sheet music in front of him so he knew it by heart. He approached slowly, not wanting to startle the boy.

He had been friends with Castiel for a month and half now but he had no idea that he played music. Dean had been introduced to Michael and Lucifer properly in this time both of whom intimidated him. He and Castiel had also moved onto the third Harry Potter book and Castiel was still rapt by the story. Dean had learnt his subtle reactions for when he was excited, amused, happy, sad, angry and confused by the story. He was enjoying Castiel's reactions to it almost as much as he was enjoying rereading the series.

But why had nobody told him how amazing he was at making music? He looked so at peace. Calm. It was... it was _beautiful_, Dean realised, watching as Castiel's eyes shut as he moved on to a more complicated section of the song.

Dean sat down on the bench, leaving enough room between he and the youngest Novak so that he wouldn't freak out. He learnt his lesson last time. Castiel didn't event react, his fingers never faltered as they danced across the piano keys. Dean watched them for a moment and then got a tiny smirk as he reached out and pressed a key.

Castiel froze immediately, hands hovering above the ivory. He didn't look at Dean but he didn't continue playing either. So Dean pressed another key. And another. Making up a ridiculous and disjointed melody that was really, truly awful. He just kept going until he got the shock of his life when a pair of hands caught his and stopped him.

Dean looked at Castiel in wonder but the boy didn't return the stare. Instead he gently placed Dean's hands over the keys and then returned his own. He pressed a key and then waited. It took the older boy a moment to realise Castiel was waiting for him to copy so he pressed the key on his half of the piano that corresponded with Castiel's.

Castiel pressed another two notes and Dean copied him.

Then they started again, adding two more notes this time before going back to the start. By this point Dean realised he was being taught how to play the song Castiel had been playing when he'd interrupted. He was at the higher end though so his melody wove beautifully through Castiel's, taking away the mournful edge Dean had been worried about when he'd first heard the music.

He continued following the younger boy's lead even as he floundered, marvelling over the fact that Castiel had touched him willingly. Castiel, whose siblings couldn't even hug him without him screaming and crying, had chosen to take Dean's hands to stop him ruining music forever.

Dean eventually started grinning as he got the hang of the song and they played it all the way through together. Twice.

Then Castiel withdrew his hands and placed them in his lap, beginning to twirl his fingers, staring down at them as if they held all the answers to the world.

"Cas?" Dean said gently, not moving and trying very hard not to startle the boy. "Uh... thank you."

He waited a moment and then Castiel finally looked at him, just a very quick flash of azure eyes, before hesitantly reaching over and patting his hands where they still remained on the piano keys. Dean stared at the hand on top of his. That made twice.

A gasp broke the silence, showing they weren't the only shocked ones – the gasp itself breaking into the bubble that had formed around them as they played and frightening Castiel causing him to leap to his feet and back away, shaking his head.

"Cassie, Cassie, I'm sorry!" Gabriel approached warily. "It's just me. I didn't mean to frighten you. It's just Gabe, Cassie, no need to be scared. It's me. It's your big bro."

Dean watched as Castiel calmed down, picking up his bag and waiting motionlessly for instruction to leave.

Gabriel watched him for a moment to be sure he was okay before looking at Dean with wide honey eyes.

"He touched you," Gabriel whispered. "I mean, I didn't come in because I could see you two playing the piano but... he touched you..."

"That wasn't the first time," Dean responded. "He put my hands on the right keys before he started teaching me."

Gabriel's eyes widened further and he went to speak but they were interrupted by the entrance of Lucifer who was looking down at a sheet of paper.

"Seriously Gabe? Does it take this long to grab Castiel? Or is he still...?" Lucifer trailed off when he noticed the stunned silence in the room. "What's wrong? Is he okay?" Lucifer turned almost frantic eyes onto Castiel who remained where he was, calm and unharmed. He seemed relieved.

"Luci... Cassie touched Dean," Gabriel whispered. "I took a while because they were in here playing the piano together but... then Cassie touched Dean's hands when they finished. I... I just... I mean the playing is new too so that's why I didn't interrupt... he never let us sit with him while he played." Gabriel was still staring at Dean as he spoke. "Who are you?"

Dean laughed. "Just Dean Winchester... I dunno... I guess I'm just incredibly persistent."

"But..." Lucifer shook his head slowly. "Wait until I tell Michael. This is amazing. I can't believe he initiated contact with someone. I can't believe he communicated with somebody." He was pulling out his phone, dialling his brother even as he spoke and Gabriel suddenly laughed and brushed a hand under his eyes.

Dean pretended not to notice, looking over at Castiel who was, in a rare display, paying complete attention. He was looking at Gabriel specifically, following the movement of his hand drying tears. Castiel approached his brother and stood there. He didn't touch Gabriel but he studied him closely, gaze questioning. It was clear what he was wondering.

"Oh, I'm not sad, Cassie," Gabriel said reassuringly. "I'm happy. I'm just... I'm so happy. Does... do you like Dean that much, Cassie? Does he make you feel safe enough to... touch?"

Castiel hesitated and then nodded, looking back at his hands.

Dean felt his heart swell.

"Well, then you can spend as much time as you want with him. None of us will stop you." Gabriel looked at Dean, eyes teary again. The older teen wanted to say something but he found himself choked up and then he found himself crushed in Lucifer's arms.

"That's from Michael," Lucifer explained. "He wants you to come over for dinner. You're not allowed to say no."

"Okay, let me call Sammy then so he knows where I am," Dean grunted. "You're heavy, get off me Luce."

Lucifer chuckled before planting a wet, loud kiss on Dean's temple that made Castiel look up again, confusion etched over his features. Dean met his eyes and smiled at him, prompting Castiel to drop his gaze but his facial muscles twitched... almost as if he wanted to smile back. He almost seemed... bashful.

Dean wondered what it was about the Novaks when he stepped through the front door to find himself crushed into another hug, this time from Anna. Michael kept a polite distance but his eyes were wide as he looked over Castiel before turning his gaze to Dean who was trying to breathe from the cage of Anna's and now Lucifer's arms – the older Novak had decided he liked trying to crush Dean's ribcage. From the few times Dean had met Michael he knew he was reserved which was why his hug came through Lucifer, though Dean had his doubts that Michael had even really wanted to hug him and that it was all his twin brother.

"Okay," Michael said, his voice coming out slightly croaky. He cleared his throat, sending a dark look at Gabriel who was snickering. "Okay, what's going to be for dinner tonight, everyone? Dean, what's your favourite dish?"

Dean blinked in surprise, floundering.

"Dean likes burgers," Gabriel offered helpfully. "We have that mincemeat defrosting."

Anna pulled a face and Michael smiled warmly, stroking a hand over her hair. "You can help me make some veggie patties for you. As for the rest of you, wash up and we'll get to work on burgers for tonight. Dean, would you mind taking Castiel up to his room, he has an after school routine."

Dean nodded numbly watching as everyone went off. He hadn't been to the Novak house so he had no idea that they all so easily deferred to Michael or that they worked together so seamlessly. It made him a little envious to think that it was usually just him and Sam since John went away on business. Or when Ellen, Jo, Ash and Bobby came over it was practically pandemonium. The harmony in this house was incredible.

Castiel was watching him curiously.

"Okay Cas, show me where your room is. And hey, I've got _Prisoner of Azkaban_ in my bag. Maybe Michael will let us read some more after dinner," Dean said with a grin. Castiel smiled at him excitedly and started walking towards the stairs, pausing a few steps later waiting for Dean to follow him.

Dean followed Castiel into his sizable room and looked around in interest. Everything was neat and orderly as he'd expected, to help Castiel feel comfortable and in control, Gabriel had explained. Routine is important, it lets autistic people feel like they have some control in a world that is so big and confusing for most of them.

Castiel wandered around putting things away and going into his bathroom to wash his face and hands, rubbing soap onto his hands with exactly five twists of his hands together. Dean smiled, endeared as usual by everything the younger boy did, how he functioned so well.

Dean wandered over to his bed as Castiel came out of the bathroom, looking more relaxed than he did during the school day. Dean smiled at him until something caught his eye and he grinned.

"Hey, I recognise this!" Dean chuckled, picking up his leather jacket from Castiel's bed, looking at the boy to find his eyes trained on the jacket, looking terrified. Dean hesitated. The jacket had been a gift from his dad and he missed it a little, as silly as that sounded, but looking at Castiel now, how afraid he appeared at the idea of Dean taking it away... "Hey come 'ere."

Castiel approached warily and Dean instructed him to hold his arms out. He slipped the jacket on, careful not to touch Castiel and then straightened the collar.

"I think this looks better on you," Dean hummed thoughtfully. "You should keep it."

Castiel's eyes lit up and he pulled the jacket closer around him, snuggling into its warmth and inhaling deeply. Dean blushed a little when he realised Castiel was smelling the jacket, taking in remnants of Dean's own scent. Castiel opened his eyes, peeking at Dean shyly with a blush colouring his cheeks, after he realised what he doing in front of Dean.

It was flattering, to say the least, and also incredible that Castiel could be this attached to him. No wonder Michael seemed ready to chain him up so he couldn't ever leave the house. If he could keep Castiel like this, stop him from freaking out and make him smile a little more... he would be willing to allow Michael to kidnap him. Anything to keep those deep blue eyes sparkling like that.

Castiel gently took Dean's hand and gave his fingers a tiny squeeze before letting go very quickly. His wordless version of 'thank you'. It was going to take a very long time to get used to even the brush of Castiel's fingertips if he managed to keep up enough courage to continue touching Dean. And he really, really hoped that he did.

"Don't mention it," Dean huffed gruffly. "Now, what say we watch some movies? Gabe said you like Disney movies?"

Castiel's eyes lit up again and he led Dean downstairs to the living room, going to the shelf and selecting the movie he wanted to watch. Dean hoped Michael would be okay with this – Lucifer walking by the den and nodding as Dean met his eyes assured him that this was allowed. Castiel had settled on the loveseat and Dean considered taking the recliner until Castiel looked at him somewhat pleadingly. Dean joined him, leaving a large enough gap between them that Castiel wouldn't feel stifled yet close enough that they were watching the movie companionably. Castiel looked pleased so Dean knew he'd done the right thing.

Dean had never been so attuned to someone's needs before, he knew he had to let the younger boy call the shots and that was hard for someone who liked being in control. However it was stranger that he just automatically knew – he knew how much space to keep between them, he knew when to speak and what to say, he knew when to keep quiet or move away. He just knew, without any prompting, what Castiel needed from him.

He wasn't even that attuned to Sam.

The credits had just started rolling when Gabriel called for them to come join the rest of them for dinner. Castiel's siblings had left the chair opposite his for Dean to sit which happened to be right between Michael and Lucifer. He wasn't how he felt about this turn of events. But it ended up being fun... until Michael asked the taboo question.

"Where have you applied for college?" he asked casually, sipping at his wine. Dean froze a little and cleared his throat.

"Uh... nowhere," he mumbled.

Everyone except Gabriel and Castiel stared at him. Gabriel because he already knew this and Castiel because he was too busy layering extra cheese on his second burger. Dean took a large gulp of soda to calm himself before meeting Michael's gaze, hoping it wasn't judgemental. It was surprised but definitely not judging.

"Do you mind me asking why?" he asked softly, as if worried about offending the boy, almost man, who was so important to his younger brother.

Dean shrugged, looking down at his plate. "Sammy's the smart one. Not me."

Michael exchanged a glance with Lucifer who shrugged before looking meaningfully at Gabriel. Dean missed all of this but he definitely didn't miss the little huff that had them all turning to stare at Castiel who was – in an act that shocked them all – glaring at Michael.

"Oops," Anna laughed.

"Don't upset Dean, Mikey," Gabriel teased. "You should apologise."

Michael looked sheepish but Dean just shrugged, smiling amusedly at the fact that now Castiel was protective of him. Who would have guessed?

"My apologies Dean, I didn't mean to pry," Michael said sincerely. Dean smiled and nodded, looking over at Castiel.

"Hey, Cas, it's okay. Why don't you go grab the book from my bag, I left it in the hall with my shoes? I mean... if that okay with you." Dean looked at Michael who seemed confused.

"Book?"

"Dean's been reading Harry Potter to Cassie," Anna explained. "But Cas won't let us join in."

Castiel glared at Anna too now.

"I think that's the nickname," Lucifer guessed. "Cas?"

Now he was being glared at.

"Cassie," Lucifer corrected and his brother was appeased. Dean was in a bit of shock.

Even more so when Michael suddenly burst into almost hysterical laughter.

"Um..." Lucifer looked concerned. "Take Cassie into the den, Dean. I'll... deal with my brother on the brink of insanity."

Dean nodded numbly and Castiel jumped up excitedly to retrieve the book before going into the den and curling up in a soft arm chair and hold the book out Dean as he took the one opposite.

"Okay... where we were?" he muttered absently as he continued to worry about Michael. He found his page and started to read. They were interrupted a few minutes in when Michael, now calm and with a smile on his face brought them apple pie and ice cream.

"Gabriel said it's your favourite," he commented. "Don't let me interrupt."

Castiel smiled at Michael, one of the bright ones he gave Dean when he produced the book they were reading each day. Michael stared at him before returning it slowly. Castiel nodded before turning his big, blue eyes back onto Dean expectantly.

"Okay," Dean smiled. "Let's see. _The trip to Hagrid's, though far from fun, had nevertheless had the effect Ron and Hermione had hoped..._"

They continued for a while, Castiel moving closer to the edge of his seat as the time increased, his eyes trained on Dean's face as he read, watching his expression closely. Dean smiled at him shyly before continuing. Castiel's growing affection with him was... confusing in some ways but mostly it filled him with an immense warmth he'd never felt before and wasn't sure how to interpret. All he knew was that today was one of the best days he'd ever had and he couldn't wait to go home and tell Sam every detail.

Castiel looked up suddenly and it took Dean a moment to notice. He paused mid-sentence when he noticed Castiel's attention elsewhere. Michael was leaning in the doorway to the den looking rather teary which he tried to cover up by gruffly instructing Castiel to get ready for bed and then come down to say goodbye to Dean as it was getting late.

Castiel obeyed though he looked very unhappy about it.

Dean marked the page and slid the book back into his bag as Michael came and took Castiel's chair.

"Thank you for everything," Dean said. "You didn't have to go to all that trouble."

"Oh yes, I did," Michael disagreed. He rubbed an eye, looking embarrassed. "Forgive me, I just never thought I'd see the day when my little brother would actually smile at me like he did tonight. You're healing him, Dean. I can never thank you enough."

Dean frowned. "Cas isn't sick." He was surprised by his own tone but Michael just laughed, shaking his head.

"I am very glad he met you. And yes, I know he isn't sick. And _you_ knowing that is even more important so when I use the word 'heal' I don't mean that he's sick. I think that word has a lot of connotations that can be applied to it. And even if we know he isn't sick, we still know that he needs our help."

Michael twisted his fingers together, looking sideways as he thought. "There's nothing _wrong_ with Castiel, not at all, it's just that the way he views the world is so different to the way almost everybody else does that he needs us to help him. He doesn't understand people on the same level that we do and so they confuse him and that confusion leads to fear which leads to him retreating which leads to the way people treat him which confuses him even more and the cycle just continues."

Michael let out a breath as Dean nodded slowly.

"I think I get it."

Michael smiled. "He needs someone to help him understand people, to understand that he doesn't have to be afraid and a friendly touch isn't going to hurt him so he doesn't need to be distressed by it. _You're the one_ who's doing that for him, Dean. Nobody else has ever been able to. You're helping him feel like he doesn't have to burrow away from the rest of the world."

"I have no idea what I'm doing," Dean said with a half-laugh, a crease appearing between his eyebrows.

Michael smirked a little. "None of us do. But if it really does bother you that you don't know very much about autism, there are such things as books Dean."

"Oh, ha, ha," Dean rolled his eyes. He got up and started to get ready to leave, surprised when Michael clapped a hand on his shoulder to lead him to the door. The others shouted their goodbyes from upstairs where they'd each retreated after washing up the dinner things.

Castiel came down the stairs and stopped at Michael's side when Dean turned at the door.

"Thank you, again, Dean," Michael said softly. "You're welcome here any time."

"Same back to you guys, anytime you want to show my dad how to cook you're welcome to," Dean chuckled.

Michael laughed. Dean looked down at Castiel who tentatively held his hand out. Dean hesitated before gently brushing the tips of their fingers together, wary about anything more in case it was too much too fast. Castiel smiled and withdrew his hand slowly so Dean knew he'd done the right thing.

A touch of the fingertips was the limit right now and he could definitely work with that.

Michael was teary again but smiling as he squeezed Dean's shoulder.

"Take care," he said.

"Sure. See you later. And I'll see you on Monday morning," Dean said, winking at Castiel who nodded. With that he left the Novak house, a definite spring in his step and a plan for his Saturday morning.


	9. Chapter 8: Expert

**Okay, I'm so worried about your reactions to this chapter. The last section is written in Cas's mind so... I didn't want to do it because I am so worried that it didn't come out right. Right now I'm okay with it, it's innocent and sweet and I'm hoping it comes across properly.**

**Just a note, Cas thinks about Disney movies in this. I just want to make it clear that I didn't pick Disney movies to be Cas's favourite because he's somehow childish or mentally inferior, I picked them because Disney movies are simple: good vs bad and good always wins, the prince always picks the right person to fall in love with, and everyone lives happily ever after. For Cas these movies aren't confusing like the rest of the world so he likes them. It's very similar to his view of the world: some people are good, some people are bad and good _should_ triumph even though in the real world it doesn't always do so.**

**Okay, so let me know what you thought of Cas's section. I wanted it to be distinctive because of the way his mind works but I also wanted it to be understandable and not confusing to go with the rest of the prose. So concrit is very welcome.**

**Thank you all so much for your gorgeous comments, you're wonderful!**

**And there will be another chapter full of rainbows and happiness after the finale tomorrow because, seriously, we're all gonna need it.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Lucifer waited until he heard the piano start up in the den so that he knew Castiel couldn't hear them before he and Michael turned to Gabriel with identical looks of seriousness. Gabriel always marvelled over how fraternal twins who were so very different in personality could pull exactly the same expressions.

"Dean and college," Michael clarified. "Speak."

"I keep telling you, Mikey, I'm not a dog," Gabriel teased. "You could try speaking in full sentences. I know it's hard when you get all serious but it would be very helpful."

Michael pinched the bridge of his nose before smiling slightly. His mood was still quite high from the previous night.

"Please, explain to us why Dean isn't going to go to college," Michael requested.

"First, why are you interested?" Gabriel quirked an eyebrow suspiciously. If Michael was going to be all degree-snobbish and insist that Castiel only be acquainted with someone qualified to do _something_ he was going to be severely disappointed in his brother for the first time in his life.

"We're concerned," Lucifer jumped in. "Dean seems like a bright kid. With everything he's doing for Cassie he's important to us and we don't want to think of him wasting his life away in the same small town for the rest of his life for some ridiculous reason."

"Such as?"

"Him believing he's not good enough – which is the vibe he gave us last night," Michael explained.

"I think that's basically it. Deano's father is always praising Sam's brain and talking about how he'll make something of himself at college and so on," Gabriel explained. "Sam told me all this, not Dean. But apparently John pretty much treats Dean as if he's going to spend his entire life here in Lawrence working at their Uncle Bobby's scrap yard and garage. Dean loves working with cars but... it's not fair for John to act as if he's not worth something more than never leaving here."

"I thought that might be the case." Michael leant back in his chair, frowning thoughtfully.

"What exactly are you going to do?" Gabriel wondered.

"You leave that to us. Go do your homework," Lucifer responded. Gabriel grumbled but did as he was told.

"Lucifer," Michael said frowning deeper.

"What?" Lucifer turned to his brother, raising his eyebrows at his current expression.

"When did we become a married couple?"

Lucifer met Michael's eyes before slumping in his seat as he laughed so hard he had trouble breathing and Michael rolled his eyes before rubbing his back.

* * *

Dean folded the sheet of paper with his directions on it before slipping it in his pocket. He grabbed his wallet and keys, creeping downstairs and praying Sam was in his room so he wouldn't have to make up a lie about what he was doing today. He was just... incredibly embarrassed about what Sam would say or do if Dean told him where he was going. Worst of all he might want to come too and this was something Dean wanted to do alone.

Unfortunately Sam was watching TV as he did his homework so Dean sighed and tried to walk past casually, hoping he was too consumed with what he was doing to notice.

But, of course, he could never catch a break.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked, looking over the back of the couch.

"Out," Dean replied simply, avoiding his eyes.

"With who?" Sam wondered curiously.

"Uh... Lisa," Dean said quickly, the first girl that popped into his head being his answer. He then inwardly swore. Now Sam was likely to pester him when he got back and ask too many questions that he wouldn't have answers to.

"Really? I thought you weren't interested."

Dean put on his best cocky smirk. "Dude, she's female and has two legs and proper breasts. Of course I'm interested."

"Gross, Dean, stop being so misogynistic."

"Bitch."

"Jerk."

Dean opened the door to hear Sam shout "use a condom!"

He shook his head with a vague smile before getting in his car and making the one and a half hour drive to Kansas State University. He stopped a passing sorority girl to ask for directions to the library which she gave him along with her phone number. Dean was mildly concerned that he had zero interest in her – she was gorgeous, long legs and red hair – but his focus was solely on his day's task.

He walked into the large building and immediately balked at the sheer amount of books in front of him. How the hell was he supposed to find anything in here?

"Hi, you look a little lost," an amused voice said. Dean looked around at a pretty, blonde woman who looked somewhat familiar though he couldn't place her in his mind.

"Yeah... I uh..." He gestured weakly at the shelves.

"Well, what are you looking for?" the woman asked kindly. "I've been here for six years, I'm sure I can help."

Dean felt relieved. "Autism."

The woman raised her eyebrows. "It's your lucky day, kid. I'm a psych grad student. Autism is going to be my specialty once I've got my doctorate."

Dean laughed. "I guess it is."

"Come with me. I'm Rachel by the way."

"Dean."

Rachel smiled and led Dean around the library. They went to two sections, one marked B and one marked RC. They went to RC first where Rachel only grabbed two booked before taking him to the B section.

"We use the Library of Congress cataloguing system as it allows for more specificity for subjects. B is psychology and RC is in medicine and health, specifically conditions such as autism. The better stuff is here in psychology. This shelf is for antisocial disorders."

She stopped and ran her fingers over a couple of rows of books and looked at Dean who still felt a little overwhelmed.

"I can still help if you want," she offered with a little giggle.

"Could you? My brother's the nerdy one but there was no way I was going to bring him," Dean replied softly.

Rachel tilted her head. "Why's that? If he could have helped..."

"He'd know right away why I was doing this and then he'd want to _talk_." Dean scowled. "So... I want to know about what causes it and how to communicate with someone who's got it."

"Okay... well, it's mainly a mystery of what precisely causes it," Rachel explained as she scanned the spines. "Neuropsychologists are looking at certain aspects in the structure of the brains of autistic people."

"Wow, you are a psych student," Dean chuckled. Rachel smiled and handed him a book. Dean flicked through pages as she continued.

"And as for communicating... it depends what form of autism someone has and how severe. Sometimes there's very little you can do to communicate with them. Do you know what kind this person has?"

Dean blushed a little. "Who says I know someone? Maybe I'm just interested."

"Whatever." Rachel shook her head as she chose a few more books. "I'm studying it because my cousin is severely autistic. It's hard for his family. So hard."

Dean thought of the Novaks and nodded sympathetically. "I've seen that."

Rachel shot him a small smile. "So... will that be okay for now? There are study desks over there. I'm there now so if you come over and have more questions I'd be happy to answer them."

Dean nodded and thanked her as she led him over. He sat at the desk opposite her and opened the first book to start reading. He became frustrated almost instantly when it became clear the book was filled with words only psychologists would understand. He closed it and tried the next one which was a lot easier to understand but was focusing on mainly Aspergers and, after reading the symptoms and a brief discussion of behaviour, he was pretty sure Cas didn't have that.

He groaned and picked up the third one.

Rachel was looking at him now.

"Problem?" she asked. Dean looked over at her and then paused as he went to speak. He leant over and tugged a printed sheet of paper from her book the read the name on top.

"Rachel Novak?" he wondered, looking up at her in amazement. "Your autistic cousin is Cas."

Rachel blinked in surprise. "You know Castiel?"

"I'm from Lawrence. Gabe, Anna and Cas go to my school." Dean smiled. "I understand why you're studying it. They've had some bad luck."

Rachel shook her head in amazement. "Cas... I've never heard him called that. We all call him Cassie – except Michael. Me, Balthazar and Samandriel have always been close with our cousins."

"More angel names," Dean rolled his eyes playfully. "Hey if you have the same name does that mean your fathers...?"

"Yeah. Our dad was furious with his brother for walking out on his family. They don't talk anymore but Dad makes sure to check in with Michael and Luci all the time. He offered to take Cassie so they could go to college but Michael is stubborn – he said he took on the responsibility of being his guardian and he wasn't going to hand him off to someone else. Dad's pretty proud of him but also worried."

Dean smiled, glad they had some family who they could rely on in tough times.

"So... even though you don't like to _talk_, is all this because of Cassie?" Rachel wondered and Dean hesitated before nodding.

"It's just... I want to help them out. I mean, I think he likes me – he touched me so he must – but I just wanted to-"

"He _touched_ you?!" Rachel cried. They were shushed by a stressed looking law student. She grimaced apologetically in his direction before looking back at Dean. "He's never touched anyone voluntarily. What... how..."

"I think he was offended by my lack of musical talent." Dean chuckled but Rachel just looked more confused so he quickly relayed the story. Her eyes widened in wonder as he spoke and then she was smiling happily.

"Dean, you are a treasure," she sighed and Dean shifted uncomfortably. "Part of it is inexplicable – you're right he must like you and trust you – but then there's the fact that you caught him in his safe place. I mean, we've tried communicating when he's playing and it hasn't worked so you're just special but-"

"Wait, safe place?"

"Yeah. It's..." Rachel thought for a moment. "When the world becomes too much and they feel overwhelmed, autistic people have this place they go to feel safe and comfortable. For some it's math and for others it's art. For some it's as simple as twiddling their thumbs. Or the most common is sitting and rocking in the foetal position – that's one of the things that can tip a parent off that their toddler has autism. For Cassie, it's always been music. It helps him."

"He's very good," Dean mused. Hmm... perhaps he could use that. It had worked once after all. "He's also very attached to my old leather jacket. Michael said he wears it when he's upset."

Rachel's eyes widened again. He had to stop shocking these family members or they were all going to be stuck with wide open eyes for the rest of their lives.

"He seems... really attached to you. What did you do, Dean?"

Dean shrugged helplessly. "I don't know but Michael was nearly crying the other night. If I can make their lives easier then I will. That's why I wanted to research."

Rachel nodded and shut off her own work before opening an internet browser and dragging the books over to help Dean, determined now that she knew he might be the only thing that could help her cousin.

By the time Dean got home that night his brain was swimming with more information than he knew it could hold and a slight new confidence, that the next time Cas had one of his panic attacks Dean would know what to do to help him. Thanks to Rachel, Dean now knew everything she did about autism and he was sure he could do this. He could handle being around Cas and helping his siblings look after him.

He went downstairs to order pizza for he and Sammy, and started telling Sam everything he'd learnt, completely forgetting the lie he'd told until he realised Sam was smirking at him.

"I knew you weren't interested in Lisa," he teased. "You're not interested in any of the girls at school."

"Done them all," Dean shrugged, avoiding Sam's eyes.

"You know... it's okay to be interested in... other things," Sam began. Dean's head snapped up, staring at him.

"What the hell are you suggesting?" he asked darkly.

"Dean, come on, it's okay. It's not... wrong, or anything." Sam wrung his hands, suddenly look very young and Dean deflated immediately.

"I'm not interested in anybody, Sammy. Now, do you want veggie or pepperoni?"

Sam frowned but answered Dean's question and didn't bring up his older brother's dating life again. But Dean trod carefully around him for the rest of the weekend regardless.

* * *

Monday morning.

First day of school for the week.

English homework due.

Math problem due.

Pack books into bag.

Get dressed in Monday, option three outfit.

Michael will come to get him for breakfast in five minutes.

Make sure bed is neatly made.

Make sure Dean's jacket is folded up.

Castiel paused in his final action when he heard Michael entering the room. He stroked his fingers reverently over the leather, refusing the urge to wrap himself up in it. If he did that too often, it would stop smelling like Dean. It wouldn't be as comforting anymore.

Michael was saying his name.

It's time for breakfast.

Michael's talking again.

"...so I'm not taking you three to school today. Dean offered to give you a lift though. You don't mind, right? Dean driving you to school?"

Castiel tilted his head, looking at Michael curiously. Michael normally didn't like strangers taking him anywhere.

But Dean wasn't a stranger. He had eaten dinner with them and Michael liked him.

That made Castiel happy. He had been afraid Michael wouldn't let him have a friend. Michael seemed to think bad people were everywhere. Castiel saw bad people all the time but he also saw good people. He thought Michael mustn't look hard enough if he couldn't see them.

Dean was good. Very good, actually. The kindest person Castiel knew, besides Anna of course.

Sam was also good. And so were their friends Jo and Ash, though Castiel hadn't been sure at first when he'd see Jo hit Dean on the arm. But he'd then realised it was only playing when Dean smiled. It was like the wolf cubs he watched on television. He'd been so horrified when they'd pounced on each other and bitten but then Lucifer had explained to him that it was how they showed affection.

Castiel had been confused at first, Gabriel and Lucifer showed him affection by telling him they loved him and giving him presents. Teaching him to play the piano until he'd gotten better than them and then they'd sit and listen, complimenting it. But then Lucifer had told him that wolves were different to people, they couldn't show affection like that so they did it in different ways. Like their family. Other families hugged and kissed. But they didn't but that was okay, because they were just different, not wrong.

Castiel nodded to Michael, trying a smile to see how he responded. He liked it when Michael got that look on his face. It was real. Not like most of the time when he was pretending and didn't have anything written on his face. But when Castiel smiled at him, he looked real, like the Michael Castiel remembered from when he was really young.

"Good," Michael smiled. "Come on. I'm pretty sure Lucifer made pancakes and you know Gabriel will eat them all if we don't get our share."

Castiel nodded and followed Michael into the kitchen, taking his usual seat and remembering how Dean had sat opposite him at dinner on Friday night. He wanted Dean to sit there every time they ate together. He liked having Dean in their house. When Dean was around everything in Castiel's head was quiet, everything stopped spinning and nothing was confusing anymore.

Nothing was scary.

Pancakes. Butter. Jam.

Cut into pieces.

Orange juice.

He could hear Michael talking about something with Lucifer. He recognised that same word that had distressed Dean at dinner on Friday so he turned to look at his oldest brothers, frowning at them.

"It's okay, Cassie," Gabriel said and Castiel turned to face him instead. "Mikey and Luci are just talking, it's nothing serious."

Castiel frowned. He sort of knew that but that word 'college'. He knew Raphael, their brother who wasn't their brother, was at college. But it seemed that talking about that made Dean unhappy. He didn't want his brothers to bring it up around him again or Dean would stop smiling and look sad.

Castiel finished his breakfast and Lucifer took his plate away when he heard the rumbling of an engine. He recognised that sound as the big, black car that Dean drove that didn't look anything like the other cars in the parking lot. It was like Dean – so different from everybody else in the best way.

Castiel jumped up and went to the front window to look out as Dean and his brother got out of the car. Dean shoved Sam playfully as they walked up the garden path. Sam was laughing about something and Dean looked... embarrassed... that seemed like an embarrassed expression.

They rang the doorbell and Castiel scurried behind Anna as she answered the door, peering out from behind her and smiling at Dean when he stepped inside.

"Hi Cas," Sam greeted but Castiel barely glanced at him, his focus entirely on Dean who was grinning at him in a strange way. Castiel frowned, reaching out his hand. He felt the usual wave of panic when Dean's smile widened and he reached his hand out to meet Castiel's but just like the first time it went away as soon as he felt Dean's warm skin on his.

All his life he'd thought touches were all bad. But touching Dean was so different.

Castiel had been curious. In his movies the princess and the prince always touched each other. Neither of them seemed to think it was bad so Castiel had wanted to try. And just like everything else about Dean, his touch made everything better. It made Castiel feel all warm inside, like the beautiful music that played at the end of his favourite movies when the prince and princess kissed.

"Oh good," Dean sighed with relief as Castiel's index finger hooked over his pinky. Castiel looked up at his face and tilted his head. "I was worried you'd have gone back to how you were before."

Castiel frowned in confusion. Why would he do that? Dean hadn't hurt him so he knew touching him was okay. Good, even.

"Are you guys ready to go?" Dean asked, taking his eyes off Castiel and giving his fingers a gentle squeeze.

Michael and Lucifer bid them goodbye and Dean took Castiel's bag, refusing to let him carry it so that he wouldn't disconnect their fingers.

"Cas gets to sit in the front seat," Dean announced just as Sam and Gabriel started bickering over which of them would get to sit there. Castiel wondered if there was something special about sitting in the front seat of Dean's car when Sam and Gabriel both looked disappointed.

Dean opened the passenger door for Castiel who got in and looked around in awe. This was unlike any car he'd been. Castiel smiled as he stroked the leather upholstery. This car smelled like Dean's leather jacket. Castiel could stay in here forever and be happy.

Dean noticed Castiel's expression when he started the car and he grinned.

"She's beautiful, ain't she?" he said and Castiel nodded absently. Dean could hear Gabriel and Sam squabbling so he leant over and Castiel glanced at him in surprise. "Don't tell your brothers but I promise I'll teach you to drive her one day."

Castiel felt a smile break over his face without his consent. Michael didn't want to teach him to drive because he was worried. He nodded eagerly and Dean smiled, pulling into the street. Castiel looked down at Dean's bag by his feet right beside his. It was open but Castiel couldn't see inside. Curiosity eventually overcame his desire to respect Dean's privacy and he toed it further open, glancing at Dean sideways, hoping he wouldn't notice.

He could see books – including Harry Potter, Castiel hoped they could read more if it today, it was getting exciting, Harry had found out Sirius Black betrayed his parents and he wanted revenge, Castiel had a feeling there was more to the story, there always is – paper, pens. The usual school stuff. He also spotted a black beanie. It wasn't too cold yet but Castiel reached in and pulled it out anyway, tugging it onto his head.

Dean noticed the movement and glanced over before bursting out laughing. Castiel jumped, not expecting the noise and he went to remove it beanie, worried Dean would be mad but he held a hand out, hovering by Castiel's but not touching.

Castiel glanced at him before taking Dean's hand.

He could feel the others in the back staring.

"Keep it on, you look... cute," Dean chuckled. "Your hair is sticking out underneath."

Castiel looked in the side mirror out his window and smiled. His hair was going everywhere. But... cute? What did Dean mean? Castiel knew you called baby animals cute... but why would Dean call him cute?

His confusion must have shown because Dean squeezed his hand around Castiel's.

"It's a compliment," he assured him.

Gabriel snapped a picture on his phone and Castiel cast him an unhappy look.

"He's right, Cassie, you look adorable," Anna cooed. "Send me a copy Gabe."

Sam was looking at where Dean was still holding Castiel's hand on the seat between them. Castiel looked down too, examining the way Dean's larger hand looked surrounding his. He rubbed a thumb over Castiel's knuckles and he felt his cheeks warm slightly. He liked holding Dean's hand. They should do this more often.

Sadly though, Dean let him go when they got to school and Castiel shrank between Dean and Gabriel. It was different now. When he was just with his family and Dean and Sam, it was easier to feel brave and touch Dean. Now it was just as scary.

He knew those bigger boys were somewhere in the school and they always looked at him in a way he didn't like. Dean didn't leave him alone to be cornered by them so he was usually safe but he knew that if they found him without Dean or Gabriel around... it wouldn't be good. It would be worse than last time.

And Castiel was scared.


	10. Chapter 9: Halloween Part 1

**I am so beyond sorry but I literally got halfway through this chapter and suffered a really bad case of writer's block so... I don't really like the last half of this chapter, it was a bitch to write and I apologise if it sucks. Next chapter should be better :) Anyway, I'm pretty sure I'm over my writer's block - fingers crossed ladies and gents - and should be able to churn out a few more chapters before my break ends.**

**Thank you so much for your patience. Enjoy! xx**

* * *

"What do you mean he doesn't like Halloween? What does he mean you don't like Halloween?" Dean stared down at Castiel who busied himself with plopping marshmallows into his hot chocolate and pretending he wasn't paying attention. He seemed to realise this was a big deal to Dean and he didn't want to be involved, especially since Gabriel started it.

Sam chuckled and pushed the bowl of mini marshmallows closer to Castiel so he wasn't leaning over the table for them. He and Dean had been coerced into joining them for afternoon tea and dinner when Lucifer decided to go all mother hen upon finding out that they'd been ordering take out for the last week since John left on another work trip. He didn't approve even when Dean explained that they alternated between Chinese and Pizza.

Gabriel had mentioned Lisa's Halloween party to Dean, wondering if he was going to go. Sam had piped in when Dean seemed indecisive, asking if they'd rather go group trick or treating, even if they were too old for it. That was when Gabriel dropped the bombshell.

"He used to love it, we'd take him trick or treating every year but then a few years ago some kids terrified him by jumping out from some bushes at us and now he won't go anymore," Gabriel explained with a shrug.

Dean turned to Castiel with a stern expression that the younger boy ignored.

"Cas, you realise they're not going to hurt you right? They were just having fun?"

Castiel gave him a reproachful look and Dean smothered a laugh.

"Yeah, okay, I know you're not stupid. So... why the fuss?"

Castiel shifted uncomfortably, looking into his mug and fidgeting with the sleeve of his trench coat. Dean frowned.

"Is it because of those kids a few years ago?" Dean wondered. No response. "It is because you're scared of Gordon and the other guys?"

Castiel flinched a little but otherwise gave no response. Dean looked over at Gabriel with a frown.

"Cas, come on, look at me," Dean said gently, inching his chair a little closer and swinging his legs around so he was facing Castiel properly. Cas turned his head slightly and met Dean's eyes. "You don't have to be scared of those guys, okay? I won't let them hurt you again. I already promised, that, remember?"

Castiel nodded slowly and Dean smiled.

"So, what do you say you, me, Sammy and your brothers and Anna all go trick or treating this year?" Dean suggested.

Castiel shook his head adamantly and turned away. Dean sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Well, you tried," Gabriel teased. "You want some more hot chocolate, kiddo?" The question was directed at Sam who smiled at him and nodded, watching Gabriel wander into the kitchen.

Dean frowned and got up, following Gabriel.

"Hey, Gabe," Dean said. "I need to talk to you about something.

"Mmm?" Gabriel pushed a mug towards Dean as an order for him to help. "About Cassie?"

"Nah. It's about Sammy. Well... he kinda... I mean I think he-"

"Has a crush on me? Yeah, I noticed," Gabriel grinned. "He's kind of adorable about it."

"Gabe, he's _fourteen_," Dean groaned. "You can't-"

"Can't what? Treat him like a kid brother like I've been doing? Relax, Deano. It's just like you and Cassie, 'kay? We're friends, and I wouldn't do something like that to you, god knows you're as protective of your little brother as I am of mine. And besides it's a _crush_. He'll get over it. He'll realise he doesn't like guys and it was just that phase most everyone goes through when they're figuring out who they are and he'll start crushing on some pretty girl."

Dean frowned. "And what if he doesn't?"

"Then _you_ are going to be a good big brother and support him no matter who he might like and _I_ will let him down easy," Gabriel explained, pouring hot milk into the mug Dean was holding and adding the chocolate for him to stir in.

"And what do you mean, just like me and Cas?" Dean muttered.

"Hmm... okay, maybe not just like. It's definitely not something quite as special. But I mean, we're good friends and I'm protective of him," Gabriel mused. "My brother acts as if you're his favourite thing in the whole world."

"Cas or Michael?" Dean teased.

"Both."

They laughed.

The heard the front door opening and then Michael's voice greeting Castiel warmly in the dining room.

"Guests?" Michael said with a grin, appearing in the kitchen.

"Luci's picking up strays," Gabriel nodded and Dean shoved him, still chuckling.

"You and Sam are always welcome, Dean," Michael assured him. "Have you guys all done your homework?"

"Uh...?" Gabriel looked at Dean who shrugged helplessly and Michael rolled his eyes.

"Get to it then. You can all work in the living room if you don't feel like dispersing to work alone," Michael told them. "Go on."

Dean raised his eyebrows and Michael folded his arms suddenly looking very reminiscent of Ellen when Dean was pushing too far.

"You too," Michael informed him sternly. "And your brother. Go."

"Yes, Dad," Dean said sarcastically and earned himself a swat to the back of his head as walked past Michael. Gabriel laughed again.

"Watch it Mikey, or we'll think you're going soft!"

They gathered their books and spread them out in a circle in the living room, Castiel joining them after a few moments hesitation at the disruption to his usual schedule. One reassuring squeeze of his fingers from Dean was enough to settle him onto his stomach to write answers to English questions beside Dean.

Dean read over his shoulder for a few minutes, eyebrows inching up at each new line.

Why hadn't someone told him Cas was much smarter than he was? Why was _he_ reading Harry Potter to the kid? Besides the fact that it was their _thing_ of course.

"You know..." Gabriel began. Dean tore his eyes away from Castiel's work to look at him. "I don't really want to go to Lisa's party. Maybe for Halloween we could all stay in here and watch a bunch of horror movies."

"Cassie hates horror movies," Anna interrupted without looking up from her biology textbook.

"He can hide under Dean's arm. What do you guys say?" Gabriel wondered.

"I always go to Lisa's party," Dean said softly. He could feel eyes on him and he looked up at Sam who nodded to Castiel. Dean glanced sideways to him to find he had stopped writing and had a sad look on his face. "But I mean, it's always so boring. The girls at our school are old news... no point if I've got nobody to hook up with."

Gabriel chuckled and held his hand out for a fist bump. Dean obliged.

"Horror movies it is," he decided.

"Can we make sure the original _Halloween_ is one of them?" Anna requested. "That's my favourite."

"What if everyone picks two and we vote for order on the night?" Dean suggested. Gabriel nodded in agreement. Dean looked to Sam to ask if he was okay with that but his eyes were still on Castiel, looking worried.

Dean looked at Castiel too and found that he was kneeling now, gathering his things.

"Cas?" Dean wondered. "Hey, what's wrong? We can put on some other movies, if horror movies really bother you. Come on, man, smile, please?"

Castiel looked at Dean, frowning at him as if Dean was a particularly difficult puzzle he wanted to solve.

"You know I would rather spend Halloween with you than those other losers, right? I'll make sure it's not scary for you. I promise."

Castiel continued to stare for a minute and Dean shifted uncomfortably but then Castiel settled back down, brushing his hand on Dean's for a moment before he went back to his homework. Dean let out a small sigh of relief.

* * *

So the following Thursday after school Dean and Sam drove, Anna, Gabriel and Castiel home to find that Michael and Lucifer had gotten bored on their day off and completely decked out the entire house and yard in Halloween decorations.

"We're going to scare the hell out of the little monsters," Lucifer said, a gleeful look in his eyes and even rubbed his hands together like some corny comic book villain.

"I understand why your parents named you Lucifer," Sam said, completely serious. Lucifer laughed and wrapped an arm around his neck.

"I like this one. Let's keep him and get rid of Dean," Lucifer decided.

"Hey!" Dean protested and Castiel took hold of Dean's hand possessively and glared at Lucifer.

"I was joking, baby bro," Lucifer assured him. "Right so, Michael, being the anally retentive weirdo he is, drew up a schedule for candy patrol. I've decided that whichever of you answers the door you have to each be a different horror movie villain to attempt to scare them. The scariest gets the leftover candy at the end of the night. I have all the costumes you will need. Fight amongst yourselves."

"Sweet!" Gabriel said, fist pumping. "Pun completely intended."

"Lame," Dean coughed at Gabriel.

"Wait until you see the living room," Michael basically sang as he joined them in the kitchen to fill up the last of the candy bowls.

"How much of that candy did you eat?" Dean questioned curiously.

Michael glared at him briefly. "I like Halloween, okay? And trust, me you'll appreciate the ambience. First-"

"Homework, we know. Jesus, you're a slave driver," Dean grumbled.

"It's a sign that he loves you. Come on, Deano."

"No going in the living room until it's movie time!" Michael ordered.

"Just go along with it, you two, it's better to accept his crazy than try to fix him," Lucifer winked. Sam grinned and followed Gabriel upstairs. Dean turned to Castiel.

"What do you say we skip homework for this afternoon and you teach me another song on the piano?" Dean requested. Castiel's eyes lit up. He'd been very subdued during the week and Dean wanted to cheer him up. Michael glanced at them but then nodded in agreement, having also noticed his brother's mood drop.

When they got to the piano Dean touched Castiel's hand to stop him playing for a moment.

"I have a song here," Dean explained. "It's pretty special to me so..." He shrugged, feeling a little embarrassed and self conscious so he just put the sheet music up on the piano and Castiel looked at it with interest. He reached out and trailed a finger over the title _Hey Jude_ before casting Dean a questioning look.

"My mum used to sing it to me when I had bad dreams," Dean explained softly. "After she died it was a long time before I could listen to it again. Kinda hoping you can play it for me."

Castiel turned to the keys and experimented with the first line. Dean watched his process with interest. He worked his way through a line at a time, piecing together the song bit by bit. Dean started humming along as he made it halfway through. Castiel turned though and waved a hand to stop him until later he had the entire song down pat and he motioned for Dean to join him. He seemed delighted when Dean scooted a little closer on the bench and sang softly into his ear, a little embarrassed but pleased by Castiel's bright eyes when the song finished.

Dean caught his gaze and found he couldn't look away and was surprised when Castiel raised a hand off the piano and keys and hesitantly reached for Dean's face.

"Okay kiddos!" Lucifer's loud voice made both boys jump and Castiel scrambled a foot away from Dean and averted his eyes. "It's time for the marathon to begin! We have snacks prepared! Get your butts down here!"

"Come on," Dean said to Cas, a little frustrated but trying to keep that out of his voice. He was so curious about what Castiel was about to do but he'd been startled out of it. They joined the group in the living room and stared around in amazement. Michael and Lucifer had transformed the room into a castle dungeon complete with cobwebs and pile of fake human bones.

"You really do love Halloween," Dean mused. "Wait, I thought you were religious. Don't religious people hate Halloween?"

"Don't you know what stereotyping is?" Anna shot back.

"Not so religious as to hate holidays all about candy and scaring children," Lucifer explained. Michael rolled his eyes.

"So, our first movie from the list you guys made yesterday is... _Halloween_... the original, appropriate," Michael decided. He flicked off all the lights and Dean grinned when he noticed several glowing decorations of a cauldron and fake blood on the bones.

The ambience was pretty great.

Castiel took the seat beside Dean and shrunk into his side, almost touching him as he looked at the TV warily. Obviously the decorations weren't a source of discomfort but the movies were. Dean was aware of him as the others settled and passed around bowls of caramel corn, candy, regular popcorn, chips and basically every kind of movie snack Dean loved. He glanced at Castiel as the opening credits finished and the movie actually started. He seemed okay so Dean focused on the movie, smirking a little.

Old horror movies were the best. The blood was overly fake, nobody's wounds spurted _that_ much, the acting as over the top dramatic as all acting used to be, and the music was the scariest part. And the music for this movie was particularly creepy.

When Michael went into his sister's room to stab her, Gabriel wolf whistled and Lucifer smothered cackles into a cushion at her ridiculous screams. Dean chuckled and glanced at Castiel to find him wide eyed and clutching a throw pillow in shock.

"Hey," Dean murmured. It took a few more goes but Castiel tore his eyes from the screen to look at him. "Want to know a trick to make it not so scary?"

Castiel nodded.

"Look at all of the way it's silly. See how fake the blood is and how bad the acting is? Just think of that, it makes you remember that it's a Hollywood set and a dummy knife," Dean explained. A little furrow appeared between the younger boy's eyebrows as he looked back at the screen.

He inched closer and closer to Dean as the movie went on and Dean peeked at him. He didn't seem too worried which was good, they still had a tonne of other movies to go through and most of them were scarier than this one.

Next up was _Nightmare on Elm Street_, the original of course, Dean had chosen it and couldn't even fathom why someone thought it necessary to remake a classic? There was only one Freddy, nobody could compare. _Friday the 13th_, sure, it was okay to remake that, Jason didn't even talk so anybody could play him really but Freddy was a horror villain with personality, you can't replace the original.

This one seemed to scare Cas more, he was jumping a little every now and then. When Johnny Depp's character was yanked into his bed though Dean jumped and yelped when a hand gripped his bicep tightly in shock at the huge spray of blood.

Everyone looked at him but he was busy looking at Castiel, stroking his hand with his fingers comfortingly.

"It's okay, buddy, really, it's so unrealistic, look, the human body doesn't hold that much blood, it's not possible," Dean murmured. "Shh, it's just a movie, Cas, it's alright."

Just when Dean thought he had the boy calm Jigsaw's laugh echoed through the house and Castiel made a terrified sound and dived under the throw blanket piled next to him on the lounge.

"What the hell?" Dean demanded.

"I changed the doorbell," Lucifer explained, grimacing.

"Change it back," Michael ordered. "Go and give those children their candy, we'll start the roster after." Michael moved in front of the trembling pile that was Castiel and murmured softly to them.

"Your brother is an idiot," Michael informed.

"A great big, bag of dicks," Gabriel agreed. Michael shot him a look and Lucifer shouted 'I heard that' before answering the door to a chorus of tiny voices shouting 'trick or treat!'.

"Everything's okay, Castiel," Michael assured him softly. "Dean's right beside you and the rest of us are here in the room. I know that you know movies can't hurt you, they're just make believe. Nothing to be afraid of. Besides, like Dean said, most horror movies are fantastical, most of the villains and the murders aren't possible."

Castiel finally peeked out from the blanket as Lucifer returned, throwing a Freddy costume at Gabriel and informing him he was on door duty for the next hour. Michael smiled warmly at Castiel.

"You can stay wrapped in the blanket if you want," Michael promised. "But don't worry, Dean's right there. You've got nothing to be scared of."

Michael returned to his seat and Dean laid his hand palm up on the cushion, wiggling his fingers until Castiel reached out and took them, squeezing gently as they returned to watching the movie. The trick or treaters started coming frequently from then and it seemed the constant interruptions to the movies made it easier for Castiel to watch. He still jumped and whimpered at the really tense parts and was especially scared when Dean's turn to answer the door came up but he wasn't shaking anymore.

Towards ten o'clock Dean glanced down at him, concerned because he hadn't been jumping a lot and found that he was fast asleep, fingers still curled around Dean's. He didn't wake up until Dean, seeing Sam nodding off against Gabriel's shoulder two hours later decided it was time for them to head home. As he tried to shake off Cas's hand gently the boy awoke, blinking up at him owlishly.

"I'm heading home now," Dean explained as Castiel tightened his hold on Dean's hand, clearly not wanting him to go. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

Castiel looked at his face for a few moments before releasing him and snuggling further into his blanket. Dean smiled down at him before saying goodbye to the others and herding Sam out to the Impala.

"That was a good Halloween," Sam yawned as he curled into the passenger seat. "Much better than some dumb party."

Dean smirked a little. "Yeah, it had its moments," he agreed. He was still a little disappointed about not getting to go to Lisa's party though, he did go every year. He looked at the time as Sam stumbled upstairs to his room. It was only midnight, the party would still be in full swing until about two or three despite it being a school night. Lisa's parents were often away on business functions and she took full advantage of that.

Dean nodded to himself before scribbling a note in case Sam woke up and ducking back outside. A party would be a nice way to wind down, he'd spent so much time lately worrying about Castiel. He liked spending time with Cas of course but he needed to relax, be loud and drink.

It had also been way too long since he'd gotten laid.


	11. Chapter 10: Halloween Part 2

**New chapter! Yay for Erin not taking months to update again! I like this chapter much better than the last. Enjoy :)  
**

* * *

When Dean pulled up near Lisa's house he could see the decorations and the teenagers spilled out from the house. Lisa was lucky she lived a little out from the main residential areas or the cops would be here by now. Dean made sure to lock his baby – he did not need to find people making out in her again – and made his way to the front door, managing to squeeze in past the couple way past second base in the doorway.

Everyone was stumbling around drunk and Dean slipped into the kitchen to hunt down a beer, popping off the top and taking a long pull. He looked around to see if Ash was anywhere nearby. Jo hated Lisa and so never came to the party unless Dean dragged her but Ash loved parties so that negated any of his feelings towards the guests and he always went. He couldn't see him so he remained where he was and finished his beer before grabbing another and beginning to wander.

He spotted Gordon and his gang and quickly made a left to go up the stairs, not wanting a confrontation when the four were clearly smashed and therefore completely unpredictable.

He was halfway up the steps when he was stopped by Bela and Lisa dressed in skimpy devil and angel costumes respectively. Dean smirked at them and leant on the wall, taking a swig from his beer.

"I hope you two have made out at least once or those costumes were a waste," he said with a wink.

"You won't be seeing it considering how late you are," Lisa chastised. "Where were you?"

"Movies with the little brother," Dean shrugged.

"Oh," Bela hummed, looking at Lisa. "We thought you might have been with your little boy toy."

Dean raised an eyebrow, confused.

"Castiel Novak," Lisa explained. "You should hear the rumours going around Dean. People are saying you've gone gay."

Dean rolled his eyes. "People don't "go gay" Lise," he sighed. "And besides, no. I'm still a ladies' man."

"Well good!" Bela chimed, clapping her hands together. "There's someone we want you to meet. Come on."

She grabbed his hand and began towing him up the stairs. Dean allowed her to drag him along and smiled a thank you at Lisa when she took his almost empty beer and replaced it with a cup of something much stronger. He had just taken a gulp when Bela practically threw him in the direction of a pretty red-head in a blue Star Trek costume – thank you sci-fi for giving nerdy girls sexy Halloween costumes.

She blinked deep blue eyes at him and Dean plastered on his best smile.

"Dean, this is my cousin Rosie," Bela said. "She's been dying to meet you. Okay, you kids have fun and use protection!"

Rosie's cheeks flushed deep red as Bela and Lisa walked off arm-in-arm, whispering with their heads close together. Dean's smile softened a little as she avoided his eyes.

"Drunk people," Dean laughed. "Gotta love 'em."

Rosie looked up at him then and smiled. "Bela's a bit of a cheap drunk," she agreed. "You missed those two making out on the couch. But I'm sure there's video if you want to watch it."

"Sounds good but... right now I'm a little more interested in the only girl wearing a cool costume at this party." He added a wink for good measure and Rosie fiddled with the hem of her dress a little shyly.

"Since when is Star Trek cool?" she wondered.

"Since always." That got him another laugh and Dean stepped a little closer. "Besides, how could something that looks that good on you not be cool?"

Rosie blushed again but managed to raise her eyebrows without looking too embarrassed. "Your reputation precedes you, Dean. Bela said you'd probably try some cheesy line like that."

"It was worth a shot," Dean shrugged, leaning against the wall and finishing off his drink. He noticed Rosie's cup was empty and left her for a few minutes to bring them back new ones. He was pleased to find she was waiting for him where he left her and smiled at him when he passed her the cup.

This was just what he needed, a pretty girl to take his mind off everything else and help him relax.

"So, why haven't I met you before?" Dean wondered.

"Oh, we just moved here," Rosie explained. "Bela's dad and mine run the family business and they're setting up a new branch here so we came to help out before we head off to the next city. Luckily for me this will be the last high school move. College next year."

"Family business?"

"Department stores specialising in fine wares," Rosie explained. "I'm starting at school here on Monday, my transfer only just came through and I thought there was no point starting on a Friday so I get time to sleep off my hangover tomorrow."

Dean laughed appreciatively. She seemed a little more confident now and he liked that.

"So Rosie Talbot, how much does it take to give you a hangover to sleep off tomorrow?"

"You mean how drunk do you need to get me before I'll jump into bed with you?" Rosie slid a little closer to Dean with a smirk that's impact was lessened by her most recent blush. Dean raised one shoulder. "I don't actually know. Based on your attractiveness and use of smooth lines... it could be a little, it could be a lot."

"Maybe we should do an experiment, you are dressed in science blue," Dean said, turning and leaning further into her space. Rosie smiled up at him through her lashes. God those eyes were blue.

"I do like experiments," she murmured. Dean reached out and took hold of her waist to pull her closer until he could brush his lips over her cheek to whisper in her ear.

"Then, let's head to a more appropriate location for such a task."

* * *

Michael and Lucifer stayed up late attempting to clean up as much of the Halloween decorations as possible before the weekend when they could, without guilty, get Gabriel and Anna to do the outside and anything left inside. They worked in perfect harmony, moving around each other with ease and communicating in silence in the way only twins could. Due to the dead silence of the house they both heard the sound of footsteps on the stairs but made no move to see which of the household's inhabitants it was.

A second set of louder footsteps echoed suddenly followed by a frightened squeak, a thump and a cry of pain.

"Cassie!" Lucifer said, dropping his armful of bats and beating Michael out at the sound of their brother's pain. He bounded up the stairs as an upstairs light flicked on and dropped to his knees beside Castiel before glancing up and freezing at the sight of his mother.

She was gazing down at the whimpering ball that was Castiel with a strange detachment that always sent shivers down Lucifer's spine.

Michael joined Lucifer but remained standing, ignoring Gabriel and Anna peeking around the corner to observe.

"Mother," Michael said stiffly, reaching a hand down to squeeze Lucifer's shoulder. Lucifer took the cue and concentrated on Castiel, hands fluttering useless inches away from him.

"Cassie," he whispered. Castiel was gripping his ankle, tears in his eyes and turned as far away from his mother as he could be. "Cassie, I need to touch you. I need to make sure you're okay."

Castiel shook his head adamantly.

"Please, Cassie," Lucifer begged. "At least let me help you up."

Again he shook his head and turned to face the banister, using it to pull himself up before methodically gripping the rail and hopping up the stairs, shuddering as he had to pass too closely to his mother.

Michael watched him go, Lucifer following worriedly before returning his eyes to his mother.

"Michael, I'm going out," she informed him.

"It's nearly two in the morning," Michael responded. "What the hell were you thinking? Sneaking up on him like that. You better hope it's just sprained. Go on, leave."

Melissa Novak's eyes flashed darkly. "Don't speak to your mother that way."

"You're not my mother. I'll speak to you any damn way I please, now get out of my sight."

Michael stormed past her up the stairs to join Lucifer in Castiel's room. He looked at Castiel slowly pulling off his sock, wincing. Lucifer met his eyes.

"It's swollen," he explained. "But I won't know if it's broken since he won't let me touch it."

Michael scowled. "Gabriel, I know you're up, go and fetch some ice," he called. The front door slammed and Castiel flinched. Michael inched closer. "Castiel, will you let me have a look? I won't touch you, I promise."

Castiel shuffled over on his bed so Michael could perch on the edge and lean over to look at his ankle. It was swelling rapidly. God he hoped it wasn't broken.

"Should we take him to the emergency room?" Lucifer wondered. "At least there they'll have someone on hand to sedate him if it is broken and he... you know."

Michael looked sideways at Castiel who was shaking his head again, clearly not liking the idea. He leant over and tugged Dean's jacket out from under his pillow to pull it around his shoulders, snuggling into its depths to ignore his brothers.

Gabriel returned with a zip-lock filled with ice that he had wrapped in a towel. Michael coaxed Castiel out from the jacket to instruct him to gently place it on his ankle which needed to be elevated on a pillow.

"Do you think it would be okay to wait until morning?" Gabriel suggested. "If it looks really bad then it's broken and you've got no choice... or at least he might let Dean look at it when he picks us up for school."

Michael frowned, considering it. Lucifer seemed agreeable but he wasn't sure.

"Would it make me an unfit guardian if it is broken and we take him to the hospital hours after it happened?" he asked Lucifer.

"I doubt it, you can't possibly know. I think Gabriel's right. At the very least Dean will be here in the morning. Cassie, would you let Dean look at your foot?" Lucifer asked. "If you agree to it you don't have to go to the hospital unless it is broken and we'll let Dean go with you if you have to."

Castiel looked up and glanced at each of his brothers in turn before nodding hesitantly.

"Okay, all good. We have more cleaning up to do. We'll come check on you soon."

Lucifer grabbed Michael and forced him to leave the room ahead of he and Gabriel.

"Let's pray it's only sprained," Gabriel murmured.

* * *

"Uhhhh..."

Dean pressed his hands against his eyes the second they opened to the bright morning sunlight streaming through the window opposite the bed he was lying in. The throbbing in his head decreased slightly as he burrowed his head down to avoid the light. He rubbed gunk out of his eyes and tried to swallow past the foul taste in his mouth. He rolled over to try and figure out where he was without his head being assaulted by the sunlight when he was suddenly reminded very vividly of where he was by the sight of inches and inches of pale skin, two perfect breasts, waves of deep red hair and a pretty face, still smooth with deep sleep.

Dean stared at the girl for a long moment, trying to remember her name and the sex itself and debating whether to pull the sheets up to afford her more modesty. And warmth.

He studied her face and a flash of dark blue eyes came to mind. He could remember holding her small, soft body close and her cries of pleasure but that was it. He couldn't remember much else and he wasn't sure he was even really thinking of anything besides her eyes. Those, blue, blue eyes.

How much did he drink last night?

A nauseous feeling began creeping up his stomach and he sat up far too quickly, the world began to spin and he barely made it into the guest room's bathroom to throw up. Well, it was either tequila or rum then because those were the only drinks that made him sick, the others just gave him wicked headaches.

He flushed the toilet and went to the medicine cabinet. He used the mouthwash and took some painkillers before hunting down his clothes. He looked at the girl in bed, studying the curve of her hip hidden by the sheet as he tried to remember her name. She was Bela's cousin... some kind of flower maybe.

He rubbed his eyes and got dressed quietly, not wanting to wake her. He still felt sick and he didn't want to deal with her waking up and finding out he couldn't remember her name... or even much about the sex. He couldn't decide which one actually made the situation worse. Besides, he'd see her on Monday.

Right now he needed to go home and-

_Shit!_

Dean scrabbled for his phone as he made his way out of Lisa's house without paying much attention to his surroundings.

_6 Missed Calls_

_11 Messages_

Dean scanned the list and was shocked to see that two of the calls were from Sam, two from Gabriel and one from Michael and Lucifer respectively. Crap, what happened?

He went through the messages which were one from Sam telling him he got a ride to school from Jo, and the rest from Gabriel demanding that he call Michael ASAP. Dean's heart clenched and he got into his car before he made the call. Something was wrong with Castiel, he just knew it.

"Dean!" Michael sounded so relieved. "What happened? We were worried."

"Party, I just woke up but that doesn't matter. What's going on? Why have you guys been calling me?"

"Castiel hurt his ankle but of course none of us can look at it... we told him if he let you look at it then we wouldn't take him to the hospital. He's getting anxious since you didn't show up at the usual time. I was just getting ready to take him anyway. Do you think you can come here? Or do you need me to get you? You sound hung over."

"You're talking too quickly," Dean groaned. "All I got was Cas, ankle, anxious, come here."

Michael made a funny sound. "That'll teach you to drink so much. Again, do you want me to get you or are you okay to drive?"

"I'll drive. I'll be there in five."

Dean fumbled in his glove box to find his sunglasses so he could drive without his head splitting open before heading to the Novaks'. He arrived and Michael shepherded him upstairs to Castiel's room immediately, trying to explain what happened but Dean's brain couldn't keep up.

"Ooh, walk of shame," Lucifer snickered w when they reached the room. Michael nodded with a small smirk. Dean just frowned in confusion.

"Those are the clothes you were wearing yesterday. Is he hung over?" Lucifer asked. Dean groaned while Michael nodded again. "Okay, I'm going to make you coffee and some bacon sandwiches. Look after Cassie."

Dean smiled gratefully at Lucifer and wandered over to sit on Castiel's bed in front of the pillow with his foot resting on it.

"Hey buddy, you don't look so hot," Dean said, smiling at Castiel. Cas was studying him with wide eyes. "Yeah, I don't look great either. I know. So... you fell down the stairs? I didn't know you were a clutz."

Castiel folded his eyes and looked away from Dean. Michael laughed lightly from his seat at Castiel's desk. Castiel looked at Michael with a soft expression. Dean smiled, wondering how long it had been since Michael had laughed like that – genuine with no trace of hysteria or forced cheer.

"So, are you gonna let me look at this?" Dean questioned. Castiel nodded. "Now, I'm going to have to touch it and if it's bad then it's going to hurt, just keep that in mind." Another nod and Dean leant over. It was swollen pretty heavily with same dark bruises. He probed gently at the sides, Castiel wincing as he did so. He pressed in a little harder, making him whimper but he shushed him automatically.

"It's okay," Dean assured him. "Now, do you trust me, Cas?" Castiel looked at him with a raised eyebrow, an expression Dean hadn't seen on him before. He smiled. "That's a yes, then. Right then, this is really going to hurt but I have to do it make sure it isn't broken. After that, if it's just a sprain, I'll bandage it and nobody has to touch it anymore, cool?"

Castiel looked worried so Dean reached out to take his hand, squeezing it gently.

"I'm sorry that it's going to hurt but afterwards it'll be okay."

Castiel took a deep breath and nodded so Dean took his foot in hand and rotated it at gently as possible. Castiel whimpered again but there were no cries of agony and no clicking. Dean quickly put it down and squeezed Castiel's hand again.

"All done and it's not broken, you were great Cas," Dean said with a grin. "Now, let's bandage it so it's not as painful to walk on and go have some bacon."

Michael brought Dean a bandage and he wrapped Castiel's ankle before helping him to his feet with minimal touching. They went slowly down the stairs and Michael directed Dean in a different direction from the dining room. He took him out to a small sunroom looking out over the garden where Castiel could sit with his foot up on the bench and they could eat.

Lucifer brought Dean his breakfast and the jug of coffee with cups for the three of them and a glass of milk for Castiel.

"So, where did you go last night?" Lucifer asked.

"Lisa Braedon's party," Dean shrugged. "To tell you the truth I don't remember a lot of what happened."

"Who did you wake up beside?" Lucifer winked at him lewdly and Dean felt himself flush involuntarily.

"I don't remember," he muttered.

"Waking up or who?" Michael wondered with a tiny smirk.

"The girl's name. She's Bela's cousin and has red hair and blue eyes. She must have been dressed as a Star Trek science officer since that was the only clothing besides mine in the room but apart from those observations I made this morning I don't remember anything," Dean explained without meeting either of their eyes. He chanced a glance at Cas who looked a little upset, picking at a thread on the bench cushion.

Lucifer laughed and Dean glared at him.

"Hey, don't be like that. You're the oldest brother in your family which means you don't have anybody to rib you. We've taken it upon ourselves to uphold that responsibility," Lucifer explained.

"Speaking of older sibling responsibility," Michael said, perking up. "We have something for you. Castiel helped up pick them out but I think we should wait until your eyes don't have black rings under them. Would you like to sleep in the guest room for a little while? I'll bring Sam here this afternoon to make things easier for you if you're not feeling too good."

Dean pushed aside the first comment and focused on the last. He looked between Michael and Lucifer who did look genuinely concerned about him. Ever since their mother had died, Dean had taken on more responsibility than he'd ever dreamed of having. With John constantly away at work, Dean was in charge of getting Sammy fed, clothed and to school on time. He was always looking after the house and his brother. They had Bobby and Ellen check up them occasionally but really, when it came down to it, Dean had nobody to share the load with. Yet here was Michael who had three younger siblings to look after, one of whom needed more attention and care than most. He had Lucifer to help him but the burden he carried was bigger than Dean's. Yet here he was trying to help Dean carry his.

Perhaps it was his sore head and very little sleep taking over but he felt overcome with emotion and he stared down into his mug as he answered.

"I'd appreciate that," Dean said quietly.

"I'll go make sure the bed's made up then," Michael decided.

Dean nodded and continued to stare into his coffee as if it held all his answers when a warm hand took his fingers and squeezed gently. Dean looked over at Cas who smiled softly at him. Somehow he just knew exactly what Dean was feeling and this was his way of telling him it was alright.

Christ, he was more tired than he thought.

"Thanks Cas," Dean said softly. Castiel squeezed once more before letting him go so he could finish breakfast and go collapse into a soft bed.


	12. Chapter 11: Shell

**So... the end of this chapter may or may not have made me tear up when I was writing it. It's not bad tearing up, it was 'holy crap I think what I'm writing is actually beautiful and I can't wait for everyone else to read it'. Also, Cas kind of took over this chapter. I was originally going to have him be sad when he found out about Rosie but then he decided that he wanted to be a little stronger than that so he gets to be mad at Dean for a little while. I really love this chapter! Enjoy guys!**

**BTW you get some more Cas POV - that's the bit that made me teary!**

* * *

Dean had no idea just how much he was going to regret his decision to go to Lisa's party until Monday lunchtime as he was escorting Cas to the cafeteria. Dean was babbling as usual, Cas's eyes glued to his face. He was like this a lot now, absolutely rapt by whatever Dean said, even if it was completely stupid. They turned down a hall and Dean was grinning as he just elicited a tiny giggle from Cas when he heard someone call his name. He turned his head to see the girl he'd woken up with on Friday morning across the hall looking at him with a tentative smile.

"Hi," she said.

"Um... hi," Dean murmured, rubbing the back of his neck. The girl approached him and Dean felt Cas move closer to him, wary of this stranger. "I'm-"

"Rosie," the girl interrupted. Dean blushed involuntarily. "Yeah, figured you were too drunk to remember. However, I would have preferred to remind you of my name when I woke up next to you instead of waking to an empty bed."

Dean winced. "Sorry... there was an emergency." Dean glanced back at Cas who, though limping a little, declined crutches or time off school to rest his ankle. It seemed to be healing well so Michael had relented and allowed him to come today without a walking aid.

Rosie's eyes lit on Cas and she smiled.

"Is this the boy Bela was telling me about? Um... Ca... something?"

"Castiel," Dean nodded. "Cas is autistic and he hurt his ankle. He doesn't like hospitals so I looked at it for him."

"Oh, Dean, that's so sweet," Rosie cooed. "Hi, Castiel, my name is Rosie."

Cas peeked out from behind Dean, eyes narrowed a little. Dean suppressed a smile.

"Don't talk down to him, he hates it," he informed her. "He's autistic, not stupid. In fact, he's smarter than I am, which while not saying much-"

"Don't be silly, you're smart. You definitely proved yourself very... _educated_ on Halloween," Rosie said, a sultry smile curving on her lips. Dean remembered nipping at those with some frequency.

Dean felt Cas take his hand suddenly and looked at him to find him glaring darkly at Rosie. He squeezed back until Cas looked at him.

"Are you okay?" he asked. Castiel shook his head and tugged Dean's hand in the direction of the cafeteria. Dean nodded and looked back at Rosie to find her eyes on their linked hands. "Sorry, he likes his routine. Time for lunch."

Rosie looked up at him. "Oh, sure. Are you going to sit with us?"

Dean took 'us' to mean his old group. "Nah. I sit with Cas, my brother, and my other friends. But, I'll see you around?"

Dean started walking around Rosie and she spun around.

"I'm free Friday."

Dean frowned, biting his lip. He'd just intended it as a one night stand... but he couldn't really remember it. Would it hurt for a repeat performance?

"I'll get back to you," he promised. Rosie smiled warmly and went back to her locker. Cas was looking over his shoulder, his expression still one filled with distrust and irritation.

Dean realised they were still holding hands and gently disconnected them, guilt stabbing his gut when Cas looked hurt.

"What's with you today, buddy?" Dean wondered. The younger boy made a small huffing sound and looked down at his shoes. "Fine, don't explain yourself."

When they arrived at their usual table, Cas shocked not only Dean but the rest of their group by seating himself between Anna and Jo – who he usually avoided, slightly intimidated by her rough attitude.

"Cassie?" Anna questioned softly.

"What did you do?" Sam asked, looking at Dean with surprise.

"Hey! Why does this mean I did anything? Maybe he's just in a bad mood," Dean protested. "Right, Cas? We're cool." Cas shot him a dark look before he began his usual process of unpacking his lunch, refusing to give Dean another glance even when he tried to get his attention. Everyone else exchanged worried looks.

"No, you did something," Ash disagreed. "Little buddy just gave you the silent 'fuck you'."

"Yeah, well, fuck _you_," Dean shot back. "I've got the next Harry Potter with me, Cas. You want to head somewhere quiet and read?"

No response.

"You want to pick the music in the car this afternoon?"

Nothing.

"You want to skip out on afternoon tea with Michael and Lucifer and I'll teach you to drive?"

And still not a look.

"Dean," Jo said softly, forcing Dean to look away from Castiel whose hands had begun to tremble slightly. "Let him be."

Dean obeyed and looked around over his shoulder at his old table to find Rosie watching him. She raised her hand and waved, a warm smile on her face. Dean raised his hand briefly before turning to pester Gabriel about copying his homework. Cas was looking at him now, or rather, glaring at him again.

Well, two out of two. Dean suspected Cas did not like Rosie.

* * *

That afternoon Michael and Lucifer had requested Dean joined them and Castiel for afternoon tea at a cafe in town to discuss that 'something' Michael mentioned on Friday. Cas was still pissed at Dean and refused to accompany them so it ended up being Dean on his own with the twins, wondering if he was about to get grilled by Lucifer who was casting him suspicious glances as they gave their orders to the waitress.

"So-"

"We can get to that later," Michael interrupted. "Dean, these are for you."

He produced a stack of glossy brochures and placed them on the table in front of Dean. The one on top read _Pennsylvania State University_. Dean flicked through the stack with a frown and sinking feeling in his chest.

"Why...?" He trailed off, unsure how to phrase the many things he wanted to know.

"What you said didn't sit well with us," Michael explained.

"The way you said it actually," Lucifer corrected. "You insinuated that you weren't good enough for college and we didn't like that."

Dean looked away from the pages of the first brochure to meet two pairs of eyes conveying identical expressions of support and genuine affection.

"Dean, if you chose not to go to college simply because you knew it wasn't right for you that would be one thing, but to choose not to go because for some reason you don't believe you're good enough... that's a terrible waste," Michael continued. "Sam told us that your dad often puts you down in that regard. I would hope it's without meaning to but your brother seems to think that both you and your father believe you're worth nothing more than staying in Lawrence and becoming a mechanic. Don't get me wrong, I find nothing wrong with any form of honest work, but if it's not what you want, if there's something you want to do with your life, if you want to get out of Lawrence... this is a way to do all of that."

"But... but my SATs..."

"Were not a disaster according to your brother. Regardless, not all colleges admit students based on their SATs and more still do not admit based on SATs alone even if they do take the score into consideration," Lucifer explained. "All of these... you have a considerable chance of being accepted. Here, look at this."

Lucifer produced a second stack, this time of applications.

"You... you guys bought applications for me?" Dean asked. "What if I decided not to?"

"They aren't _that_ expensive... and Lucifer and I are able to access the considerable inheritance left to us by our grandmother," Michael smiled. Dean raised an eyebrow. "She wrote our mother – her only child – out of her will when she tried to kill Castiel, all her money was left to her grandchildren. We have placed most of it into college funds for our siblings but our own portions we use as we see fit. Now, colleges, these applications are for most of those. You choose which ones you would like to fill out."

Dean took the pile and shook his head slowly, trying to wrap his mind around that overload.

"You want me to go to college?" he asked quietly. Lucifer went to answer but the waitress brought out their orders and they were forced to clear the table and wait for her to leave before continuing their conversation.

Dean felt a little weird so he sipped quietly at his soda while Lucifer spoke.

"Not exactly. We want you to want to go. We don't like the idea of you not living up to your potential, and trust us, you have tonnes."

"But... I can't afford to go... all the money saved up is for Sam," Dean murmured.

"There are all kinds of scholarships you can apply for and do not think we would be unwilling to assist you any way we could," Michael said softly. Dean opened his mouth to protest but Michael raised his hand, a hard look on his face. "Don't argue Dean. All the reasons you're giving me to not go are just telling me even more that you actually _want_ to but have convinced yourself that for these reasons you shouldn't and therefore don't need to. Now, answer me honestly, what is it that you want to do with your life?"

Dean frowned and looked down at the slice of pie on his plate, poking at it with his fork as he thought. He had never, ever, really considered the possibility that he could go to college. Nobody had ever believed in him enough or told him that he could do it. Why did Michael and Lucifer seem to think he was so special? He wanted to tell him that they should just give up on him but knew they wouldn't listen.

It seemed arguing wasn't going to get him anywhere so he turned his thoughts to Michael's question. What _did_ he want to do? He loved cars and he would enjoy being a mechanic, restoring old cars but that wasn't something he liked the idea of doing all the time. Restoring old cars was something he thought could be a great hobby one day when his life was settled and he had a good job providing him with a steady income – all of which could be achieved easily if he had a college degree to show employers. But... he hadn't even thought of what he wanted to do if he had one.

Dean's thoughts went to Cas and to studying the psychology texts with Rachel. He'd actually _enjoyed_ that. And not just that autism ones. He'd flicked through the chapters on bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, anxiety. Psychology was fascinating. Then Dean thought about his favourite class at school: history. He loved learning about old wars and the interesting developments that lead to the world today. He used to love coming home and telling Sam all the interesting factoids he'd learnt flipping through the textbook and Sam had always listened avidly even though Dean was sure he already knew most of them. That had stopped when Dean realised Sam was smarter than him but he never stopped being fascinated by the facts. The difference was that now he shared them with Cas sometimes when he was just chatting at him.

Dean's mind turned then to reading Harry Potter to Cas even though he knew the kid was smarter than him and could definitely read them on his own. But it was their _thing_ and it was special. The image changed in his mind to Dean reading with some faceless, nameless kid he didn't know.

He smiled.

"I think I'd like to be a teacher." The words surprised him but obviously not the brothers who were both smiling and nodding when he looked up at them.

"What kind?" Lucifer questioned.

"I dunno... kids maybe. Or teenagers. Special needs kids?" Dean wondered. "I could do a double major and get a psych degree so that I can help them."

"That sounds wonderful," Michael smiled. "So, I suggest you go through those and find out which schools have a program that would suit what you want to do."

Dean glanced down at the stack of glossy brochures and their accompanying applications. It felt daunting but for the first time it didn't seem unrealistic to think he could make it into one of those schools and come out with a degree so that he could get a job he loved and wanted instead of one he felt he had to do regardless of whether he enjoyed it or not.

With a strange feeling of lightness, like an unnoticed weight had been taken away, Dean dug into his pie and Lucifer finally turned the conversation to why Cas was ignoring Dean and, embarrassed, Dean didn't have an explanation for him.

"Well, when did he start acting like that?" Michael wondered.

"This afternoon. He met the girl... from Friday," Dean mumbled. "I don't think he likes me talking to her."

Michael's eyebrows rose in surprise. "What do you mean?"

"She tried to talk to him and he just glared at her and made me take him to the cafeteria. Then he wouldn't talk to me afterwards," Dean shrugged.

"He's jealous," Lucifer nodded.

"You can't know that," Michael disagreed. "Castiel's ability to form accurate opinions of someone is something we don't understand. He probably saw something about her Dean can't."

"No, pretty sure he's acting like anybody else when it comes to sharing their favourite thing," Lucifer grinned. "Cassie doesn't want to share Dean with some pretty girl."

Dean laughed and the brothers looked at him. "Seriously Luci? I'm with Michael. She did speak to him as though he was a three year old. Maybe that's why he doesn't like her."

"True. He used to get irritated with us when we did that before we knew how smart he is," Michael agreed.

"How smart is he?"

"Well, last year his psychologist conducted an IQ test that placed him in the genius bracket. One hundred and seventy three, I recall. We asked him to do it when we discovered his penchant for physics and mathematics." Michael's smile betrayed the pride he was attempting to hide. "After that we quickly realised why he would give us the cold shoulder when we 'baby talked' him, as Gabriel insisted we were doing."

"There you go," Dean said. "He doesn't like her because she acted as if he was dumb. Jealous? You get some strange ideas."

Lucifer looked between them and shrugged. "Agree to disagree. I'm positive he has the ability, like every other human being, to be jealous when somebody else is getting the attention they usually do."

Dean rolled his eyes and waved to the waitress to request another slice of pie and some coffee while Michael turned the discussion to his latest paper and wondering which topic he should use for it.

* * *

Anna and Sam were playing chess while Castiel sat on a cushion next to the coffee table to watch. He was absolutely fascinated by the game. None of his siblings had taught him to play but he was quickly picking up on the rules. Sam was playing with the black pieces. He'd said it was to give Anna an advantage.

Castiel wondered if he was regretting that now. Sam was grimacing down at the only four black pieces left on the board among the eight white ones that belonged to Anna. Perhaps somebody should have warned Sam that Anna was very good at chess. Gabriel said she played 'sneaky' – he wasn't sure what that meant but none of his brothers liked to play with her because she usually beat them.

Now she was beating Sam.

Castiel studied the positions of the pieces and noticed a pattern in Anna's. Sam was about to move the wrong piece and Castiel put his hand out to stop him. Sam drew back before he touched Castiel, looking at him in surprise. Castiel took Sam piece shaped like a horse's head – a knight – and placed it in a better position before reaching over to flick Anna's king over.

"What...?" Anna stared down at the board in surprise. "Cassie..."

"Wow... That looks like checkmate to me, Cas, thanks!" Sam said, grinning at him. Castiel smiled back, enjoying how similar Sam's smile was to Dean's.

Dean.

Castiel's heart ached and he looked around the corner to the front door but couldn't see Michael's car outside so they weren't back yet. Castiel felt bad for the way he had acted towards Dean. He hadn't meant to upset him but... he had felt sick when the girl with the long red hair had smiled at Dean. Dean had smiled back at her. She had wanted to spend time with him alone. That's what people did when they were in love. If Dean started to love that girl then he wouldn't have as much time for Castiel.

Castiel didn't want Dean to stop spending time with him. They still had so much of the Harry Potter books to go and then Castiel wanted to read some of his favourite books with Dean. They couldn't do that if somebody else took up all his time.

What was special about that girl anyway?

Her hair was pretty but...

Castiel looked at Anna. His sister had long red hair too and Dean didn't seem to want to spend time alone with her.

And that girl sat with the boys who scared Castiel. Why would Dean want to spend time with her? She could be on their side.

Anna and Sam were now squabbling over whether the win counted since Castiel had helped. He looked between them and realised by their smiles that they were just having fun and not actually fighting. That was good.

Castiel knelt up so he could rearrange the board while they continued to disagree when he heard the sound of a car pulling into the driveway. He got up and leant around the doorway to watch the front door. Sure enough Dean and his brothers came inside, talking about something. Dean had the college books Castiel had gone to get with Michael and Lucifer.

He studied Dean closely. He didn't look upset so it mustn't have been a bad talk. Last time the talk about college had made him look unhappy so Castiel hadn't wanted Michael to bring it up again but maybe this time it is had been okay. Dean set the pile down with his bag next to Sam's stuff and looked up straight at Castiel.

He raised his hand, looking worried and Castiel felt a squeeze in his heart.

He'd made Dean sad.

Castiel walked out from the living room towards Dean, ignoring the slight pain in his ankle and stopped in front of him. Dean held out his hand in invitation and Castiel looked at it briefly, knowing that if he took it Dean wouldn't be sad anymore. But there was something else people did to make others stop being sad and Castiel wanted to try it. His hands trembled a little as he looked up at Dean's face, taking in his green eyes.

He looked worried still but was smiling. That smile wasn't the right one so Castiel knew that despite how scared the idea made him, it was the right one.

He quickly wrapped his arms around Dean's waist and pressed against him, shutting his eyes, waiting for the black and the pain in his lungs to grab him like it always did when someone touched him. He was shaking and he knew Dean could feel it.

The gasps from all around him made him tremble harder and the tightness started to spread through his chest as the black came to punish him.

But then two very warm arms came around him and pulled him closer to the heat radiating from Dean's body and the black retreated quicker than it had crept up, scared of the brilliant warmth that Dean was wrapping him in. Castiel pressed his face against Dean's chest and tightened his hold. The black was gone. It wasn't anywhere and Dean's warmth was making the pain go too. It couldn't touch him when Dean was wrapped around him. When Dean's light and warmth was there the black and the pain couldn't be.

"Holy shit, Mikey are you crying?"

"No, he's not."

"Shut up, Gabriel!"

"Crap... has he ever hugged anyone before?"

"Never. I need a minute. Sorry."

"My twin is a secretly a girl."

"You said he wasn't crying."

"And Anna told you to shut up."

Castiel shut the other voices out and just hid inside the new shell Dean had carved for him. This one wasn't a deep as his old shell and it wasn't dark, quiet and lonely. This one was vibrant and colourful, it was filled with Dean's light and warmth, it was a happy shell. It was closer to everyone else. This shell didn't just tamp down the fear like his old one did – hiding him from it until he was ready to face it again – no, this shell destroyed the fear, it didn't let it exist. It helped Castiel feel lighter so that when he decided the leave this shell, it wouldn't be just from bad to worse, it would be from somewhere good to somewhere that was actually manageable.

One more voice spoke and this one Castiel let in, he let the tone fill him up and chase away more of the black that was hidden inside him.

"Thanks, Cas."

_No, thank you, Dean._


	13. Chapter 12: Fail or Succeed

**New chapter for you all! Hope you like it! It's just fillery and light due to the heavier content in the next few chapters, but regardless! Enjoy yourselves!  
**

* * *

The next day Rosie approached Dean at his locker, looking a little shy. Dean greeted her with more enthusiasm than he usually would – on a high from the previous afternoon. He was just as astounded and excited as Michael about Cas hugging him. What it meant... Cas was actually... he was moving past his fears. True, he hadn't touched anybody besides Dean yet but he'd never hugged anybody in his life and he'd picked Dean! Dean tried to ignore the way his mind lingered on how well Cas fit into his arms and focus on the miracle that was his progress.

"So... Friday?" Rosie said. Dean frowned at her and she sighed dejectedly. "You forgot."

"Friday..." Dean snapped his fingers as he remembered. "You wanted to go out. I'm free if you still are."

Rosie's deep blue eyes lit up in a way that reminded Dean of Cas – a thought he pushed firmly away, this was about getting this girl into bed again so he could remember it this time, and also possibly having a good time. Rosie was kind of cool after all, not anything like Bela or Lisa, Dean remembered vaguely enjoying talking to her. The date might be great even without sex.

"Of course!" she said brightly. "How about you pick me up at seven?"

Dean raised an eyebrow. "You think you're the one in charge here?"

"_I'm_ not the one who forgot your name. You are going to go along with whatever I want or you're not getting your memory jogged about last Friday," Rosie grinned with a wink. "Friday, seven. I live next door to Bela."

Dean nodded as Rosie leant towards him. "Better plan something fantastic, Mr Winchester." She pecked him on the cheek then and walked off. Dean watched her go, eyes drifting down to her ass clad in skinny jeans.

"Whoa..." he breathed.

* * *

Dean had promised Bobby he and Sam would have dinner with him that night so he planned to just drop Cas, Gabriel and Anna at their house and head over there to help Bobby finish up for the day before they started cooking. Cas was disappointed when Dean informed him they wouldn't be joining his family for dinner and his sad eyes made Dean feel guilty enough to go inside for a little while.

"Dean, I have a request," Michael announced. Dean looked up from the piano keys to the oldest Novak questioningly. "Would you come with Castiel and I to his appointment in Kansas City?"

Dean frowned. "Why?"

"You know none of my other siblings enjoy going," Michael said quietly. Castiel flinched beside Dean and he automatically reached over and squeezed his hand before gesturing to Michael so they could leave and talk away from Cas. Dean didn't want his feelings hurt. When they were out of earshot Michael added, "and _I_ don't like taking Lucifer."

"Yeah, Gabriel told me. He also said you don't like going alone."

"This is true. But there are ulterior motives belonging to Dr Albert... and also myself," Michael admitted. Dean sighed.

"Lay it on me."

"Dr Albert wants to meet you," Michael explained.

"What? Why?"

"Why do you think? The progress Castiel has made since becoming your friend... it's incredible Dean. Dr Albert was interested when I told him about Castiel touching you but not enough to meet you – he used to touch our hands sometimes so we both presumed it was him healing from the trauma our mother inflicted on him that made him withdraw further. However, he called last night to confirm the appointment for this week and I told him what had happened. Castiel has never hugged anybody as you know so this is an amazing development. Dr Albert wants to meet you to psychoanalyse you as well as observe Castiel with you."

"Cool, I get that, he's interested in his case," Dean nodded. "Your motives?"

Michael looked guilty and lowered his voice further, just in case Castiel was attempting to listen in. They both doubted it but Michael wanted to be sure. "I'm hoping your presence will stop him behaving as he usually does. Dr Albert can't even be in the same room as Castiel without upsetting him."

"Why?" Dean frowned. He didn't like the sound of this doctor. What if he'd hurt Cas?

"Castiel hates doctors, Dean. All of them. Dr Albert is very well respected in his field and he's a good man, I assure you. Castiel just doesn't liked doctors..." Michael shrugged helplessly. "Will you come with me? Please?"

"He really wants to meet me?"

Michael nodded so Dean nodded back. "Sure, I'll go."

Michael grinned. "Thank you."

Sam chose that moment to join them. "Dean, we should go now or we'll be late. You said you wanted to help Bobby close up."

"Right, Sammy, let me say goodbye to Cas and we'll head off then." Dean returned to Cas who looked up at him expectantly. "Sorry, buddy, it's time for me to leave. But I'll see you tomorrow morning."

Castiel sighed sadly and lifted a hand to Dean who took it and squeezed gently. Castiel tugged until Dean leant close enough so he could put his arms around him. Dean chuckled at the pushy demand for a hug.

"Funny, I thought yesterday might be a one off," Dean chuckled, the same weird tightness constricting his breathing and he gave Cas a gentle squeeze. The unnamed emotion was practically suffocating him and he wasn't sure how to deal with it so he quickly let go and squeezed both of Cas's hands as he removed them from his body. "See you later, Cas."

Cas watched him go sadly and Dean tried not to feel guilty. Sam smiled at him teasingly as he started the car.

"What?" Dean asked. "He looks like a kicked puppy when he's sad."

"I think he has a crush on you," Sam responded and Dean slammed his foot on the brake. Sam swore and glanced back to make sure nobody had been behind them. "Was that necessary?"

"What are you on?" Dean demanded. "You don't just make pronouncements like that when I'm driving! And where did you even get that idea?"

"I don't know maybe the fact that he likes you better than his own family, he's basically your cuddle bunny and he was totally jealous of that girl," Sam ticked off. "Do I need to keep going?"

Dean shook his head slowly, driving more carefully now. "Sam, Cas is just... I'm his first friend and he feels a little differently than we do. You're confusing friendly affection with something else."

Sam looked sceptical.

"Besides, I'd rather talk about your crush on Gabe."

Sam's face turned bright red and he turned to stare out the window. Dean laughed, his objective achieved and continued to rib Sam all the way to Bobby's, enjoying the different expressions and colours his face took on.

Bobby was waiting for them when Dean pulled up.

"You took your time, ya idjits!" he said gruffly but the effect was ruined when Sam bounded in for a bear hug that Bobby happily bestowed on him.

"Dean was guilt-tripped by Cas into sticking around for a little while," Sam explained.

"That's the autistic boy belonging to that new family?" Bobby questioned. "Saw 'im with his brothers at the grocery store. Met their mother too. Piece o' work that woman."

"You think?" Dean scowled. Sam frowned, confused. He hadn't been let in on the story of what happened with Cas and his mother. Bobby also looked confused so Dean just motioned his head towards the shop. "Need help closing?"

Bobby nodded and sent Sam inside to start dinner.

"What was that about Mrs Novak?" Bobby asked.

Dean chewed his lip. "This is private, Bobby."

"Who am I gonna tell, boy?" Bobby grouched.

"You tell Ellen everything. You two gossip like teenage girls. Don't tell me you didn't already know about Cas because she told you," Dean replied. Bobby smiled and tilted his head in acquiescence.

"You got me. But don't worry, if it's private then I'm not going to say a word."

"She tried to drown Cas in the bath five years ago," Dean said quickly, wincing. Every time he thought about it he had this terrible image in his head of a ten year old Castiel, terrified as the woman who is supposed to love and nurture him not only betrayed him by touching him beyond his limits but then forced him into... Dean shook his head. It made him want to throw up so he cast it from his mind as best he could and looked for Bobby's reaction.

"Her own son?" he said, shocked.

"Yup." Dean shuddered. "She couldn't deal with him anymore. But it's okay. His brothers and sister take care of him really well and they love him."

"From what I hear from your little brother, so do you." Bobby's eyes were warm. "I also hear you've been filling out college applications on the request of that family."

Dean flushed.

"I gotta meet those boys. Anyone who finally convinced you to give college a shot deserves me to sit down for a beer and thank 'em personally." Bobby had a look of pride on his face. "'bout time someone convinced you yer better than your old man thinks."

Dean sighed at the mention of John and Bobby grimaced. They worked closing up the shop in silence until it came to balancing the register. Dean counted out the money while Bobby filled in the end-of-day program and finally spoke.

"When's he getting here?"

"Sunday night," Dean replied. "Said he's staying for two weeks this time."

"So, he'll be here until the hangover wears off and then he'll be off on his next job." Bobby shook his head, annoyed. "Doesn't that man realise that one day he won't have a family to come home to?"

Dean shrugged one shoulder, just wishing they could drop it. He didn't want to think about what would await him on Monday and Bobby always got angry when he tried to defend John.

"Besides, Bobby," Dean said. "Lucifer has practically adopted us, we're not going to go hungry or anything with Dad gone."

"Well, good. Now come on, let's go help Sam with the grub."

* * *

When Friday rolled around Dean hadn't even thought once about his conflicting promises until Rosie met him in the parking lot to remind him.

"Shit," Dean groaned. She actually looked annoyed. "I agreed I'd go to Cas's appointment." He looked over his shoulder to where he could see Michael's car pulling up to let out his three siblings. "His psychologist wants to meet me. Can we reschedule? Tomorrow? I promise I will make it up to you big time."

Rosie folded her arms. "I'm starting to think you don't actually want to go."

"Are you kidding? Of course, I do!" Dean took her wrist and pulled her closer, smiling charmingly. "I will take you anywhere you want, on me, we can do whatever you want. This time I won't reschedule, I won't forget and I especially won't forget your name."

Rosie looked over Dean's shoulder and gently tugged her hand away, smiling at him with a little more warmth.

"I really like you Dean," she said softly. "So I'm gonna say yes. I'm not just in this to sleep with you again, though, okay? I actually... like I said, I like you."

Dean blinked and nodded. "Sure. Not just sex. Got it."

Rosie smiled and walked off, leaving Dean wondering what he'd just agreed to. He didn't _do_ girlfriends.

Another hand took his then and he glanced around, smiling to see that it was Cas.

"Hey there, how's my best buddy?" he asked. Cas smiled at Dean even as Gabriel protested Cas being granted the position of best friend. Dean just stuck his tongue out at him.

"It's okay Gabe, I'm sure you can be Sammy's best friend," Dean said. There was a spluttered protest of embarrassment from Sam who tried to divert Dean's teasing, obviously unaware Gabriel already knew about his crush and wanting to keep it from him.

Anna just rolled her eyes at the boys and shepherded them into the school. Cas was a little withdrawn since it was Friday but Dean really hoped he could make that better too.

* * *

Since Dean read to Cas the entire drive to Kansas City he seemed to forget where they were going and why until Michael parking next to the very familiar building. Castiel immediately drew into himself and started shaking his head.

"Hey, hey, come here," Dean said softly. Castiel glanced at him and Dean opened his arms. "Come here, Cas."

Castiel took off his seat belt and hesitated before inching across the seat until Dean could wrap his arms around him. Michael turned from the driver's seat to watch.

"Now, I want you to take a deep breath and hold it for a few seconds then let it out," Dean requested. Castiel obeyed and Dean smiled. "Good. Feel better?"

Cas nodded reluctantly.

"I'm right here, okay? I'm with you this time. I promised you once I'd never let anything hurt you and I meant it. So, this time, you've got nothing to be afraid of because I'm going to be right there. I'll even hold your hand the entire time if you want."

Dean smiled when Cas nodded and gripped Dean's shirt in his hands, snuggling deeper into his arms. This kid was turning into a cuddle bug. That made three times in one week. Michael looked completely gobsmacked.

"When he makes steps he makes them in leaps and bounds," the eldest Novak marvelled with a head shake.

Cas started to squirm and Dean released him immediately. He looked apologetically up at Dean as he put distance between them and Michael sighed as if believed he'd spoken too soon. Dean just smiled warmly at Cas.

"It's okay, buddy," he assured him. "You're allowed to set the boundaries. Short hugs are good."

Cas smiled slightly before getting out of the car and Michael and Dean followed suit.

"I bet it's worse because you're here, right?" Michael questioned. Cas looked embarrassed and Michael felt guilty. Dean squeezed his shoulder as they walked into the building. Michael went to the reception desk while Dean and Cas took seats.

Cas turned to Dean and held out Harry Potter for him to take.

"I didn't even see you grab that," Dean smiled. "Okay, we'll keep going." He returned to reading quietly so he didn't disturb anyone and when Michael joined them he looked so relieved. It was the calmest Castiel had ever been in this waiting room even if he was twitching and twisting his fingers together anxiously. He also flinched every time a new patient was called, terrified he would be next. Every time this happened, Dean reached over without pausing in the story to squeeze Castiel's hand, a gentle reminder he was not alone. Michael thought he might just love Dean Winchester a little.

When Castiel's name was called, he tried to resist getting up from the chair but a whispered promise from Dean that Michael couldn't hear made him reluctantly stand. He grabbed Dean's arm as they walked into the office past Dr Albert.

"Michael," he greeted warmly. "Castiel. And you must be the famous Dean."

Dean smiled distractedly at the psychologist before returning his attention to Cas.

"Okay buddy, right here, you need to loosen your hold though, my fingers are tingling," he said gently. Dr Albert watched them closely as they all took seats.

Dean glanced around the office once he was sure Cas wasn't going to freak out. He was tearing up, his eyes glassy but he wasn't panicking or crying so he took it as a good sign. The office was warm and welcoming and there was no giant desk separating Dr Albert from his patients. They were seated in comfortable armchairs by a bookshelf filled with all manner of books – scientific ones, novels, geography, tourist magazine, children's books – there were also bean bags and some sets of lego.

The psychologist waited until Dean had finished looking and turned to him before he started.

"Dean, I'm Dr Albert, Castiel's specialist," he introduced himself. He was a middle aged man with greying black hair and very warm hazel eyes. Dean didn't find anything threatening about him so he relaxed a little. "I've been in charge of his case for the last six years, before that I was a consultant at the centre his mother brought him too."

Michael looked down at the mention of his mother and Dr Albert grimaced.

"So... you know a lot about him?" Dean questioned.

"Well... what he lets me know. He's not very open." Dr Albert smiled and looked at Castiel seated between his brother and Dean. "Not like he is with you. Castiel, what's that you've got?"

Castiel was holding the book to his chest almost like a security blanket. He ignored Dr Albert's question. The psychologist didn't seem fazed and Michael answered a second later anyway. It was clear to Dean this was how most appointments went.

"It's the fifth Harry Potter book. Dean's been reading them out loud to him," Michael explained. Dr Albert raised his eyebrows.

"Castiel is quite capable of reading on his own," he said, not condescendingly but with a question beneath it.

"He likes Dean's voice, I think," Michael said softly. "And it's... just something they do together."

Dr Albert turned to Dean now without speaking.

"I started one afternoon after some kids pushed him around," Dean explained. "We've just kept doing it. It's a trade-off. He plays me music, anything I want him to play for me, and I read this to him."

"Fiction is a marvellous tool we use with autistic children," the doctor said fondly. "It teaches them a little bit more about how people act and react. I find often that for those who lack affective empathy, it helps them to gain a little."

"What?" Dean frowned.

"Ah, sorry. There are two kinds of empathy, Dean. Cognitive and affective. Cognitive empathy is the ability to acknowledge that other people have feelings and they might be different to your own and affective empathy is the ability to understand and even feel another person's feelings. Many people with autism have quite strong cognitive empathy even if they lack affective empathy in average levels."

"Cas is plenty empathic," Dean defended.

"Only cognitively." Dr Albert smiled. "I would however be interested in retesting his empathy levels once he has heard the entire series and spent more time with you. His progress now is phenomenal. He is touching you... he is relatively calm. He has never been calm in this room."

Dean fought back the proud smile that wanted to light his features. Dr Albert turned to Michael and began his routine questions that Dean tuned out. He looked down at Cas who blinked up at him when he sensed Dean's gaze.

"Hey, do you wanna do me a favour?" Dean asked. Cas nodded. "Next time the doc asks you something, you wanna answer him? I think he'd get a kick out of it. He might even fall off his chair."

Dr Albert was watching Dean whispering to Castiel out of the corner of his eye as Michael spoke. Dean knew he was analysing them but he didn't care. He kind of liked the guy. For a shrink he wasn't so bad he guessed.

"So, Castiel," Dr Albert said when he was finished with Michael. "Your behaviour with Dean is something I haven't seen in you before. Dean's special to you isn't he?"

Dean didn't know whether it was his request or the topic choice from Dr Albert but Cas actually met the psychologist's eyes and nodded briefly, looking at Dean and then back at his own lap. Dr Albert's eyes softened.

"Is he safe Castiel? Is Dean like your music?"

Castiel nodded again, this time without looking up and his cheeks flushed pink for a reason Dean couldn't tell. Dr Albert nodded and made a few notes on his notebook under those from Michael's discussion with him. He chewed his lip for a moment and looked at Dean who was obviously confused by his question choice.

"Castiel has placed you in a position akin to playing the piano," Dr Albert explained. "When he plays the piano, it created a special shell around him, an escape from things that might be confusing, painful or frightening to him. The music helps him escape from that and regain control over his thoughts and his feelings and maybe make sense of anything that has been bothering him. You are just like that, you're-"

"His safe place," Dean finished. He flushed when an eyebrow was raised in his direction and Michael suppressed a smile of amusement. "I did some reading."

The doctor's eyes glittered. "I see."

The rest of the appointment continued with other routine tests and questions. Castiel clung to Dean's side when Dr Albert stood but the man assured Castiel they wouldn't do any reflex tests today. He wanted to do a linguistic test. Michael explained to Dean that they liked to test Castiel's vocabulary and understanding of syntax, morphology and phonology. Dean learnt that Cas actually chose not to speak and if he ever did then he would be able to have one hell of an intelligent conversation. Dean didn't even know some of the words Cas was writing down existed.

Then, just for fun apparently, Dr Albert set down a worksheet with some physics problems that Castiel solved before Dean even had a chance to work out what half of it meant. It was clear how much enjoyment Cas got out of the numbers and diagrams. Dean would have to remember that. Sam liked physics too. Dean would get them to geek out about it together one day, that would be interesting to watch.

Then the appointment was over and Michael was actually smiling as he paid and they left the building.

"Home now?" Dean wondered.

Castiel shook his head as they got in the car.

Michael grinned back at him. "We always go out for burgers and milkshakes after, don't we?"

Castiel nodded and smiled at Dean.

"There's this diner he absolutely loves. I think he has a crush on the Friday night waitress."

Castiel folded his arms and actually gave Michael a look that Dean knew was universal for 'don't put your own problems on me'. Dean laughed and grinned cheekily at Michael.

"What's her name?" he teased. Michael flushed. "Come on, tell me."

"Sierra," he sighed. "She's studying history at college part time. She's always there on Fridays when we go in. She dotes on Castiel."

Dean teased Michael for a little while but it occurred to him that perhaps this girl's kindness towards Castiel was what endeared her to Michael and it made him really consider how much he gave up for his little brother. Nothing was more important to him than Cas. Dude really needed a someone to sit him down and tell him that he's done an amazing job and to stop beating himself up.

Sure enough a beautifully brunette skipped up to their table with a bubbly greeting to Michael and Cas practically as soon as they'd sat. Michael introduced Dean and Sierra's eyes widened.

"I was told about you," she beamed. Dean felt embarrassed and looked down at the menu in front of him. Castiel was sitting between Dean and the window and looked much more content than he had back in the psychologist's office.

Sierra took their orders and Michael asked Dean what he thought of the doctor. They were just discussing his manner of speaking to Castiel when Sierra brought their food.

"Damn that was quick," Dean grinned.

"Anything for my two favourite men," Sierra explained with a wink towards Michael. The man pretended not to notice as he took his food from her.

"Thank you," he said and she smiled, chirped 'enjoy' and waltzed off. Dean decided not to comment and dipped one of his fries into his milkshake as he thought back on the session. Cas watched Dean's action curiously.

"Hey, why don't you like him, Cas?" Dean wondered. "He seemed cool to me."

Castiel lifted one shoulder embarrassedly and sipped his shake. Dean looked at Michael who also shrugged.

"He doesn't like any doctors. Although... he didn't mind Dr Albert at one point."

"Really?"

"Castiel may not like him now but Dr Albert has done a lot for him. He's the whole reason Castiel knows how to play the piano," Michael said with a soft smile, observing Castiel mimicking Dean and dipping one of his fries into his milkshake. Dean and Michael both laughed at expression of awe as he chewed it.

"Really?" Dean asked, looking back at Michael.

"Yes. He minored in music in college. Anyway, his PhD thesis was on musical therapy for autistic children. His partner told him to go ahead, it was worth a try since Castiel had no true outlet for his feelings. Up until then when everything became too much he curled into the foetal position and rocked. It was... troubling to me and truly upsetting for Gabriel and Anna. So, Dr Albert took him to music room of the medical centre, sat him down and explained the piano and sheet music to him. After twenty minutes Castiel was playing Queen's _Bohemian Rhapsody _with very little help from the man."

Dean grinned. "That's... amazing."

"He has always been a fast learner. The next day, Lucifer and I used all our savings to buy him a piano and a box full of sheet music. He just... fell into it. Now there's hardly anything he loves more than creating music. It's worth anything to me as long as it helps him. It does help, Castiel, doesn't it?"

Castiel looked up and smiled at Michael. He leant over the table and Dean thought he was looking to grab the salt but instead he brushed his fingers shyly over Michael's hand. Michael froze, a small gasp escaping him. Castiel's big blue eyes flicked up to Michael's face and his tough lingered several more moments before he withdrew, eyes back on his meal.

Michael was breathing slowly through his nose, clearly trying to contain his reaction for Castiel's sake. Dean could hear him muttering 'don't make it a big deal' repeatedly. But regardless of how he was reacting now, Dean knew that Cas knew how special that was for his brother. It was Cas's way of acknowledging everything Michael did for him, that he knew and was grateful. Michael knew that too but mostly he was just amazed and so relieved. That Castiel could touch him again meant he hadn't failed, he hadn't somehow scarred him further with his clumsy attempt at parenting from the age of 18.

It might mean he'd actually done a good job.


End file.
